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Band 4

In the furture , nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extant do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#furture #nobody #newspapers #books
Since the middle of
last
 century with the development of
technology
 .,
increasing
Add an article
an increasing
show examples
 number of
people
 will
can
Remove a modal verb
apply
show examples
not buy printed newspaper or
books
 and they want online without paying .
as a result
 of
this
 ,a group of
people
 hold the opinion that whatever human used to printed newspaper or online .in my opinion ,I agree with
this
 view .
Firstly
 of
all
Add a comma
,all
show examples
 it has to be admitted that
technology
 networks bring convenience to
people
 is the driving force why I agree
This
 is largely due to the that the progress of science and
technology
 provides
people
 with convenience ,
people
 can use computers or mobile phones to browse information ,the network can learn a lot of knowledge
this
 can be exemplified by the case of online since through the network can learn a lot of knowledge ,when
people
 do not go out ,you can learn and understand new knowledge ,and many online
learn
Change the form of the verb
learning
show examples
 is free ,so that the community has
progress
Change the verb form
progressed
show examples
 but
also
 enhance
people
 love. Undoubtedly I think that online and
technology
 to make progress of society By the same
token
Add a comma
,token
show examples
 a large of
people
 like to online study because of ,
this
 is convenience online read is
also
 a contributing factor why I support
this
 view.
People
 used to
printed
Wrong verb form
print
show examples
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
 or
books
 ,while
in contrast
 ,in current society
people
 tend to
printed
Wrong verb form
print
show examples
newspapers or
books
 ,I agree because I feel learn and can collect and have my own library
therefore
Add the comma(s)
,therefore
show examples
 ,I think online reading is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 and
achievements
Fix the agreement mistake
achievement
show examples
,so that, why I support
this
 opinion. To sum up I
agree
Add the preposition
onagree
toagree
withagree
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 the view that
people
used
Add a missing verb
are used
show examples
 to reading
books
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
online .in order to have a better online reading .everyone should take
this
 into serious consideration so that we can have a bright future.
Submitted by 59213142 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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