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Many people believe that primary education should also teach arts and music, not only science and mathematics. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #education #arts #music #science #mathematics
It is discussed, in education like primary
school
, to include different subjects
such
 as
art
 and
music
, and not only science and mathematics. I totally agree with
this
, and in
this
 essay, I am going to write some of the benefits of doing
such
 programs.
Art
 and
music
 have been around for centuries, and they have been one of the most effective ways to unite people.
Therefore
, it would benefit kids at
school
 to teach them not only a useful skill that could help them in the future and how to be creative
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
 tell them how to be together and learn and get inspiration from others. If
this
 wasn't allowed children would get bored and not be as stimulated to go to
school
.
Although
 those subjects can be used to help kids with different problems. As we probably know, many other young people in education suffer from stress and anxiety. If they could introduce these creative classes, it could help them to relax as a cure for those problems.
For instance
,
art
 and
music
 have been used a lot by psychologists and doctors to help people that had trauma,
that is
 why if they teach them at
school
 it could have
a very good results
Correct the article-noun agreement
very good results
a very good result
show examples
 on them.
However
, for some can be still hard but it still would play its part
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
relief
Replace the word
relieve
show examples
 from these issues. In conclusion, many still believe that
such
 creative classes should be taught in primary education, In my personal opinion, I strongly believe that
art
 and
music
 would play an important role in
Add an article
the
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daily life of a young person.
Submitted by Tizi999 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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