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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people believe that primary education should also teach arts and music, not only science and mathematics. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #education #arts #music #science #mathematics
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It is discussed, in education like primary
school
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, to include different subjects
such
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 as
art
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 and
music
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, and not only science and mathematics. I totally agree with
this
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, and in
this
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 essay, I am going to write some of the benefits of doing
such
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 programs.
Art
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 and
music
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 have been around for centuries, and they have been one of the most effective ways to unite people.
Therefore
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, it would benefit kids at
school
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 to teach them not only a useful skill that could help them in the future and how to be creative
,
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apply
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 but
also
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 tell them how to be together and learn and get inspiration from others. If
this
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 wasn't allowed children would get bored and not be as stimulated to go to
school
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.
Although
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 those subjects can be used to help kids with different problems. As we probably know, many other young people in education suffer from stress and anxiety. If they could introduce these creative classes, it could help them to relax as a cure for those problems.
For instance
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,
art
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 and
music
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 have been used a lot by psychologists and doctors to help people that had trauma,
that is
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 why if they teach them at
school
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 it could have
a very good results
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very good results
a very good result
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 on them.
However
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, for some can be still hard but it still would play its part
to
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in
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relief
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relieve
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 from these issues. In conclusion, many still believe that
such
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 creative classes should be taught in primary education, In my personal opinion, I strongly believe that
art
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 and
music
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 would play an important role in
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the
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daily life of a young person.
Submitted by Tizi999 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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