In many places, people’s lifestyles are changing rapidly, and this affects family relationships. Do you think advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

#places #people’s #lifestyles #relationships #developments

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Our world is advancing day by day and

as a result

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, the way we live

also

Linking Words

change. While

such

Linking Words

changes

Use synonyms

bring us benefits in terms of comfort, it is making our family relationships suffer, which, I believe, is a great disadvantage to us. Our lifestyle

changes

Use synonyms

give us the comfort we need. Nowadays, more people in the household

work day

Correct your spelling

workday

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to night to earn enough money to support the family’s needs.

As a result

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, they are able to have a comfortable life, able to provide their children with education and

able

Replace the word

ability

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to provide healthcare needs for the entire family.

For instance

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, my father was the only one earning money for the entire family when I was young, and the idea of housewives earning additional income was not popular

then

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However

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this

Linking Words

has changed and both husband and wife work in a modern household to be able to pay the monthly bills.

On the other hand

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, lifestyle

changes

Use synonyms

gives negative effects

Change preposition

show examples

the relationship within families. The amount of time we spend on our smartphones and computers have increased to the point where we do not even have time for family bonding. When

this

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happens frequently, the relationship between the family members cools down, which could actually lead to unnecessary consequences

such

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as family conflicts due to the lack of understanding of each other. There are even some restaurants that require the customers to leave their mobile phones in the lockers upon their entrance, to encourage socialising during their meal at their restaurants. To summarise, we are, in a way, forced to change the way we live by a lot of factors. While these

changes

Use synonyms

allow us to have a better and more comfortable

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

, they have negative impacts

Change preposition

show examples

our social lives and more importantly,

Change preposition

show examples

our family relationships, which I believe is not a good development.

Submitted by Wai on Sun Dec 05 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

307 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

geographic separation
economic advancement
technological advancements
face-to-face interactions
egalitarian structures
gender roles
traditional roles
work demands
financial stability
access to education
healthcare
cultural shifts
traditions
cultural identity
family heritage

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In many places, people’s lifestyles are changing rapidly, and this affects family relationships. Do you think advantages of such developments outweigh the disadvantages?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is loss the of particular species of plants and animals. Other say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, the government prioritises economic growth above all other concerns. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?

Nowadays many young people are going to other countries for their future. What are the reasons for it? How it will be in 30 years?