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Some people think that school and government should take responsibility to transport children to school. While some people think that parents should get children to school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #school #government #responsibility #transport #children #parents
Commuting to
school
 safely is an important and everyday activity for each family.
Therefore
, there are different ideas about who,
government
, educational institutes or
parents
, is responsible for
this
 activity. As far as I am concerned, it is flexible but both sides should take the obligation. In regards to
government
 and
schools
, they have a responsibility to ensure the safety of
school
 commuting. Undoubtedly, a
school
 bus filled with pupils and trusted teachers is much safer than other public
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
show examples
 which are full of strangers with potential dangers.
Moreover
,
this
 welfare is
also
 beneficial to
parents
 who are occupied by daily work. The
school
 transport release sufficient time for them to commute to their workplace as they don’t need to take
children
 to the
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
Additionally
,
school
 transport is
environmental-friendly
Replace the word
environmentally friendly
show examples
, punctual and efficient. It is relatively easy to implement by local institutes.
Nevertheless
, some people believe that taking
children
 to
school
 is a family duty for
parents
 as it is a part of education. As some experts stated, the communicating time between
parents
 and
children
 is less in the recent decade,
while
, the timing for
school
 commuting is a good opportunity to hold a family chat. For
parents
, they can get
along with
 their
children
 and learn what happened in the
schools
.
Furthermore
, since students reside in different places of the city, especially in metropolises, the
government
 or
school
 must design various routes to fulfil the needs of the majority of
children
. It will inevitably cost a lot. The cost may be better to invest in improving educational facilities and quality. In summary, I think both could be applied.
Government
 and
schools
 can develop some routes to meet the demand of major younger generation that
travelling
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
 to
school
 safely. Simultaneously,
parents
 are flexible in taking their
children
 to
school
 if they have a more convenient solution.
Submitted by dancedance5 on

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task response
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the two opposing views and your opinion. Make sure to address all parts of the essay prompt in your response.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of your essay is generally effective, with clear topic sentences and supporting details. However, some areas could benefit from stronger connections between ideas and more varied linking devices.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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