Some people think that the internet has brought people closer together while other think that people and community are become more isolated Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #internet #community

Our life has recently changed

dramaticaly

Correct your spelling

dramatically

due to

internet

access. Some people say that

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

has brought a significant improvement to your

Correct your spelling

life

life's

lifes

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lives

show examples

, but on the other side, some reckon that it has made our living much worse.

Correct your spelling

show examples

Correct your spelling

show examples

am strongly concerned, that

internet

devices are making our living experience

substancially

Correct your spelling

substantially

easier and in

generall

Correct your spelling

general

generally

better, provided that, they are used properly.

This

factor has advantages, but

also

disadvantages and

this

essay will discuss both sides of the statement. Nowadays, people

tends

Change the verb form

tend

show examples

to forget that online life is not even in

third

as important as your normal human living.

Specially

Replace the word

Especially

show examples

, between the

childen

Correct your spelling

children

are spreading unhealthy

hibits

Correct your spelling

habits

, where they

prefere

Correct your spelling

prefer

to stay alone with their mobile devices or

computher

Correct your spelling

computer

computers

, rather

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

go outside and play with their peers.

Consequently

, they are becoming unsocially and lose

comunications

Correct your spelling

communications

communication

skills, which in future makes it impossible to work with them.

In addition

, their relations with others are ruining and when they

finally

realize it, it is already too late.

This

exacly

Correct your spelling

exactly

what has happened to my cousin, when as a child his parents let him look too long on the screen and now he can not find a job, due to lack of any social abilities. Albeit, we can not forget about

uncannily

Correct article usage

the uncannily

show examples

important benefits of the

internet

. With

regarts

Correct your spelling

regards

to that,

online

Add an article

the online

an online

show examples

connection can help us when we want to communicate with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people from different sides of the world. It can be helpful while working or when we want to keep in touch with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

family or friends.

For instance

, I have been volunteering for

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

3 years, so that I have a great number of international friends with whom I want to talk. Without

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

innovations, I would be

unabled

Correct your spelling

unable

enabled

to do so.

Furthermore

, because of that I can practise my

english

Change the capitalization

English

show examples

and broaden my mind during my phone calls. After

takig

Correct your spelling

taking

everything into

Remove the article

apply

show examples

consideration, I am ensured, that benefits are far more overshadowing any drawbacks.

Although

, we need to make wise choices when to stop

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

before it takes control over us. The

internet

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show examples

endless mine of possibilities, but we need to know where to dig in.

Submitted by anna.greczylo on Mon Dec 06 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

361 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Today family members do not eat meals together. Why does this happen? Is this a positive or negative development Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some believe that advances in technology are increasing the gap between rich and poor while others think the opposite is happening. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

some people think that dangerous sports should be banned,but others think the people should have freedom to choose sports activities discuss both views and give your opinion.