In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

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Endeavor
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Endeavour

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is the golden key to
success
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. In some countries,
children
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might receive the
message
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that if they try hard, their efforts will
finally
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pay off and help them achieve their goals.
This
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approach has both upsides and downsides, which will be examined in
this
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essay. On the positive side, telling
children
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that they can achieve anything with hard work can lead to
success
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in their future lives. It can
instill
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instil

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a belief in their talents and abilities, motivating them to work hard to reach their dreams.
For example
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, a survey conducted among the top students of a prestigious university in Iran revealed that most of them believed as
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that anything is achievable through effort, and
this
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belief was the key to their academic
success
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Additionally
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,
this
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powerful
message
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can make
children
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more resilient in the face of problems. They become more tolerant of setbacks, thinking they can overcome challenges by trying hard.
As a result
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, they are likely to think outside the box and come up with innovative solutions
instead
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of giving up.
However
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, there are
also
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drawbacks to
this
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message
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may sacrifice their enjoyable childhood moments by constantly striving to improve their skills to achieve their goals. A well-known psychologist expressed that
this
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can isolate them and hinder their social development.
Moreover
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, the belief that hard work guarantees
success
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can sometimes lead to disappointment. Some
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

may try hard but fail
due to
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a lack of understanding of their abilities or external circumstances. Given their mental vulnerability,
this
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can result in depression, anxiety, and stress. In conclusion,
while
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telling
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

that they can achieve anything if they try hard can help them become successful and resilient, it can
also
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

lead to social isolation and mental health issues. It is crucial to balance
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

message
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

with realistic expectations and support.

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task achievement
You have addressed all aspects of the task, providing a balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. To further improve, consider adding more varied examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is clear and logical, with a well-defined structure. Each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows well into the next. To enhance cohesion, use a broader range of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between ideas more explicitly.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frame your discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, and each paragraph supports your main points well.
task achievement
Your use of specific examples, like the survey conducted among top students, adds credibility to your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • achieve
  • try hard
  • positive mindset
  • self-belief
  • motivates
  • ambitious goals
  • resilience
  • determination
  • confidence
  • self-esteem
  • growth mindset
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • failure
  • effort
  • hard work
  • seek support
  • individual differences
  • abilities
  • capabilities
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