In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Endeavor
is the golden key to Change the spelling
Endeavour
success
. In some countries, Use synonyms
children
might receive the Use synonyms
message
that if they try hard, their efforts will Use synonyms
finally
pay off and help them achieve their goals. Linking Words
This
approach has both upsides and downsides, which will be examined in Linking Words
this
essay.
On the positive side, telling Linking Words
children
that they can achieve anything with hard work can lead to Use synonyms
success
in their future lives. It can Use synonyms
instill
a belief in their talents and abilities, motivating them to work hard to reach their dreams. Change the spelling
instil
For example
, a survey conducted among the top students of a prestigious university in Iran revealed that most of them believed as Linking Words
children
that anything is achievable through effort, and Use synonyms
this
belief was the key to their academic Linking Words
success
. Use synonyms
Additionally
, Linking Words
this
powerful Linking Words
message
can make Use synonyms
children
more resilient in the face of problems. They become more tolerant of setbacks, thinking they can overcome challenges by trying hard. Use synonyms
As a result
, they are likely to think outside the box and come up with innovative solutions Linking Words
instead
of giving up.
Linking Words
However
, there are Linking Words
also
drawbacks to Linking Words
this
Linking Words
message
. Use synonyms
Children
may sacrifice their enjoyable childhood moments by constantly striving to improve their skills to achieve their goals. A well-known psychologist expressed that Use synonyms
this
can isolate them and hinder their social development. Linking Words
Moreover
, the belief that hard work guarantees Linking Words
success
can sometimes lead to disappointment. Some Use synonyms
children
may try hard but fail Use synonyms
due to
a lack of understanding of their abilities or external circumstances. Given their mental vulnerability, Linking Words
this
can result in depression, anxiety, and stress.
In conclusion, Linking Words
while
telling Linking Words
children
that they can achieve anything if they try hard can help them become successful and resilient, it can Use synonyms
also
lead to social isolation and mental health issues. It is crucial to balance Linking Words
this
Linking Words
message
with realistic expectations and support.Use synonyms
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task achievement
You have addressed all aspects of the task, providing a balanced discussion of both the advantages and disadvantages of telling children that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. To further improve, consider adding more varied examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is clear and logical, with a well-defined structure. Each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows well into the next. To enhance cohesion, use a broader range of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between ideas more explicitly.
coherence cohesion
You have a strong introduction and conclusion that effectively frame your discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, and each paragraph supports your main points well.
task achievement
Your use of specific examples, like the survey conducted among top students, adds credibility to your arguments.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example