IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic. Should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? Or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves? Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and with relevant evidence. You should write at least 250 words.

#argument #case #reader #specialist #topic #nations #wealth #food #education #responsibility #governments #citizens #support #arguments #evidence
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Is there any ending for human suffering on
this
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 plant ?
Everyday
Replace the word
Every day
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, we see young children dead on
streets
Correct article usage
the streets
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 because
lack
Change preposition
of lack
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 of daily
essentiels
Correct your spelling
essentials
such
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 as nutrition, health care and education. In the
last
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 centuries, the world has suspected huge social differences between two main parts : developed countries and the poor ones.
Therefore
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, I believe wealthy people should start to help others
whish
Correct your spelling
which
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 are in
critical
Add an article
a critical
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situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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 for historical and survival causes.
First
Linking Words
 of all, many nations conquered weak populations in the past leaving them without any resources. In fact, their project was to expand the geographical limits of the kingdom.
For instance
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, the
british
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British
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 empire was known
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the fact which sun remain all the year in its territory as a symbol of gigantic expansion. As
results
Fix the agreement mistake
result
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, different
cultutres
Correct your spelling
cultures
 were included as parts of one authority that used their manpower , natural energy and raw materials.
This
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 reality
force
Change the form of the verb
forces
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 rich
persones
Correct your spelling
persons
person
 to share part of their fortune
that is
Linking Words
orginally
Correct your spelling
originally
 possessed by others. Another reason, humanity is under the threat of extinction, if we continue fighting
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 money and power. Nobody can ignore the dangerous actions used on fragile communities in order to increase the quality of life for one small group only. Researches show that 90% of global wealth are
distrubted
Correct your spelling
distributed
 between 5% of
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
 population, while the other 95% are suffering to satisfy their daily needs. So, what if
this
Linking Words
 treasure were well-shared on
this
Linking Words
 planet ? Our race will continue to involve
to
Correct pronoun usage
us to
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 reach our future generations. To conclude, wealthy groups are directly responsible to assist needed families with jobs, and they must provide
them
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
necessary
Change preposition
with necessary
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 facilities like hospitals, schools and charities. I hope that we start to look for each other in
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
 compassionate way in order to eliminate the discrimination from our societies.
Submitted by eng.ali.hammoud.26 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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