The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before.

#internet #information

Due to advancement

Change preposition

Advancement

show examples

technology

Add a comma

,technology

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

has changed the way we share and consume

information

This

has

also

created severe

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

Add an article

a breach

show examples

breach

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breaches

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in users private

data

and

also

some people are addicted due to

this

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these

show examples

new trends,

goverement

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government

should come up with rules and

regulation

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regulations

show examples

to overcome

this problems

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this problem

these problems

show examples

. As

high

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the high

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amount of

information

traffic is flowing through the internet the

data

user

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the user

show examples

is at risk, hackers

tries

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try

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

steal

this

data

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

does not belong to them, it is

individual

Correct article usage

the individual

show examples

right to have

this

information

stored in

secure

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a secure

show examples

place.

Also

,only after their

consent

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,consent

show examples

the

information

should be shared with others. As social media apps like Facebook, Youtube, and Instagram has

stared

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started

show examples

to produce

contents

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content

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Correct your spelling

exponential

exponetial

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an exponetial

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rate,

this

leads to addictive nature in human begin. They start to

loss

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lose

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focus and their attention span can

also

go down.

This

nature is somewhat similar to that of a drug or alcohol addict.

Fristly

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Firstly

First

goverement

Correct your spelling

government

governments

and big tech companies should come up with

framework

Add an article

a framework

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on how to protect the private

data

of their public or customer.They should well define the parameters for user

information

sharing, and security

measure

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measures

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should be

implemeted

Correct your spelling

implemented

so that it becomes hard for hackers to bypass the systems.

Secondly

, To overcome the addictive nature of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social apps should conduct awareness programs in

certian

Correct your spelling

certain

interval

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intervals

show examples

so users can be aware of

this

habit.

Moreover

, app owners should come up with a warning system to let them know that they are using the platforms for a while and what ill effects it can

led

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lead

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

futher

Correct your spelling

further

. To conclude, we should be aware of misuse of internet and how they can be prevented,

also

rules should be implemented.

Submitted by surajgadhvi92 on Sun Dec 19 2021

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cybersecurity
phishing
identity theft
misinformation
fake news
social isolation
internet addiction
data privacy
digital literacy
regulations
awareness programs
manipulate
proliferation
consent
escalated

What to do next:

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The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before.

Fully explain your ideas

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary schools rather than secondary schools. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, owning a home rather than rent is important for people. Why is this the case? Do you think that this is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages.

In some countries, owning a home rather than rent is important for people. Why is this the case?　Do you think that this is a positive or negative situation?