Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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Sound
Use synonyms
is everywhere in daily life, from the path you way home, to the restaurant’s background
music
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. Depending on the situation and the
time
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, sounds can be gorgeous and make
people
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delightful.
On the contrary
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, it may cause some pressure
to
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on
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mental health.
This
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essay will discuss both sides and what can be accepted.
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Throughout
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Along
Add the preposition
withAlong
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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human history,
music
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has accompanied for a long
time
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. At that
time
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,
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sound
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the sound
show examples
was originally to scare horrible
animal
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animals
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in order to prevent them hurt
people
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. Till
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
middle age,
music
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had an immense advancement.
Propagandist
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Propagandists
show examples
and persist were utilized
music
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to make
people
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together.
Also
Linking Words
, many greatest masterpieces were developed at that
time
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. It did alleviate anxiety and
bring
Wrong verb form
brought
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peace to everyone.
Moreover
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,
people
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nowadays have
a diverse
Remove the article
diverse music
a piece of diverse music
show examples
music
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attributed to the internet. We can admire either ubiquitous or unique
music
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. Distinctive
music
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such
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as aboriginal
music
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can be seen easily and be heard wildly.
This
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can convey that everyone can enjoy
a
Remove the article
apply
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various
music
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of background culture. In another hand, since the urban sprawl,
people
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has
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have
show examples
been annoyed by some “noise” sounds. We can say that piano
sound
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is elaborate
music
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.
However
Linking Words
, if
this
Linking Words
kind of
sound
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showed up
at
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in
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middle
Correct article usage
the middle
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night
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of night
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, you definitely not think that
this
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is delicate.
Furthermore
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,
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
“wrong
time
Use synonyms
music
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may lead to some mental and physical health problems.
In addition
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, I consider that noticeable
music
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can mitigate pressure and bring coherence to everyone.
In
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On
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the opposite, as long as the
music
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not
Add a missing verb
is not
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played
in
Change preposition
at
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an appropriate
time
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or inaccurate place, it might
causes
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cause
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some issues that really matter.
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
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