IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Environmental problems are serious in many countries. It means that the only possible way to protect the environment is at an international level. To what extent, do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, all
the
Correct article usage
apply
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countries
Use synonyms
 are facing serious environmental issues
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 people believe that
can
Correct pronoun usage
they can
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 only be resolved internationally by
giving
Verb problem
making
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 little effort from all
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nations
Use synonyms
. I completely agree with the above-given statement
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 the reasons will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
Linking Words
, every nation should be aware of the actual cause of the environmental issues. The international
organizations
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organisations
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 should make strict rules and regulations which are followed by every
Use synonyms
countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
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 very strictly
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 those who do not follow them should be
penalized
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penalised
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 heavily. Every
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countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
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 has many industrial areas, farms, mills and factories where
the
Correct article usage
apply
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production house is established which produce a huge number of goods and
materials
Use synonyms
 by using a variety of products and chemicals and
due to
Linking Words
 these
reasons
Punctuation problem
reasons,
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 environmental
causes
Use the right word
issues
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happen
Verb problem
occur
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. Manufacturing products
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 good
but
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, but
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 maintaining industrial waste
materials
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 and chemical
carrying out
Verb problem
disposal
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 in proper ways is mandatory
and
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, and
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 the government should keep their observation over
this
Linking Words
 very carefully.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
All
Fix capitalization
all
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 the developed and undeveloped
nations
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 should be facilitated by the government to deal with the huge number of
poisoned
Replace the word
poisonous
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 gases
carried out
Verb problem
emitted
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 by industrial production
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 spread in the atmosphere and damage the environment.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
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 should support financially the
nations
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 and especially the undeveloped
nations
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 provide them with proper techniques and treatment to
minimize
Use the right word
minimise
show examples
 the
cause
Fix the agreement mistake
causes
show examples
 of the issues and waste
materials
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. Developed
nations
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 can easily invest in advanced systems and mechanisms
at
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, at
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 the other side undeveloped
countries
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 cannot afford advanced mechanisms
and
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, and
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 international
organizations
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organisations
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 should keep their eye on
this
Linking Words
. In the conclusion, every country should come together and abide by the rules and regulations made by international
organizations
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organisations
show examples
Linking Words
also
Punctuation problem
, also
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 carrying out industrial
waster
Use the right word
waste
show examples
materials
Use synonyms
 in a proper way can make
this
Linking Words
 world a better place to live in and
minimize
Use the right word
minimise
show examples
 the environmental causes.

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task achievement
Make sure to include clear examples and explanations that support your main ideas more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Work on connecting your ideas more smoothly. Use linking words to guide the reader through your points.
coherence and cohesion
Expand your conclusion to reinforce your main ideas. Summarize your key points clearly for a strong finish.
content
The introduction clearly states your opinion on the topic.
content
You mentioned the role of international organizations, which is a relevant point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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