Some countries are struggling with an increase in the rate of crime. Many people think that having more police on the streets is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree

Recent years have witnessed a rise in the
rate
of
crime
in some countries; some opine that hiring more police on the streets will alleviate the problem of
crime
. In my opinion, I totally disagree with them since perpetrators are not educated and their problems are not identified. Both reasons
along with
my perspectives linked to the topic will be outlined in the following paragraphs. There are many reasons why having more police may not reduce the
rate
of
crime
. The most important one is the unsupported education of almost all criminals. Without a doubt, they cannot find
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jobs if they
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
not graduated. Without having money, they tend to act in inappropriate ways. A common example of
this
would be that most people who cannot reach
education
Correct article usage
an education
show examples
are more likely to steal money from others because they
had
Verb problem
do
show examples
not a chance to make it.
Consequently
, there has been a marked growth in the
rate
of
crime
.
Additionally
, one significant argument is that the root cause is not solved by having more public officers.
For instance
, some perpetrators like to kill someone because they have
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
personal issues
such
as addiction, taxation, and other bad experiences. There is a universal consensus that nations
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
from wealthy families often are not criminals because they are taken care of by well-educated parents.
Moreover
,
polices
Correct subject-verb agreement
police
show examples
cannot solve their own problems, which
is
Verb problem
apply
show examples
still
existed
Wrong verb form
exist
show examples
.
To sum up
, even though most people think that police are opted to reduce the
crime
rate
, I am of the opinion that it will not mitigate the problem of
this
rate
. Were the
govermenterment
Correct your spelling
government
to solve the root cause of the problem, it is more likely that their nations will be happier lives.
Submitted by watunyu.s on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your response directly addresses the prompt. Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction and provide a clear argument throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Improve the clarity of your ideas by organizing your essay with clear topic sentences and logical transitions between paragraphs.
task response
Good use of examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Well-structured introduction and conclusion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: