IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic. The only way to reduce the amount of traffic in cities today is by reducing the need for people to travel from home for work, education or shopping. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

#minutes #topic #amount #traffic #cities #people #travel #home #work #education
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Well, it is a debatable issue that traffic can be controlled by making everything online like
work
 from home, education and shopping
that is
 needed in congested cities, today. I personally disagree with
this
 statement because it is not an appropriate way to deal with
this
 problem.
Firstly
, everything has some requirements to make more comfortable and reliable so,
work
 needs proper ambience without any disturbance and distraction.
For example
, if a man works from home, he gets distracted by everything because of noise as well as household works. They can't be professional in their
work
. No doubt,
work
 from home gives flexible time to the public but, it
also
 becomes
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
delay
Correct article usage
a delay
show examples
 in
work
. Apart from it, some works need the attendance of people mostly in labour
work
, even in the technical era, men are not properly dependent on robots.
Secondly
, the relationship between student and teacher is very beautiful which helps students to become more successful in their
life
. Even the internet and highly educational sites are available for students but, the role of teachers is more necessary because they give the right path and motivate students on every face of
life
.
Moreover
, shoppers are depending on the sale of products if people buy everything online , they can't survive and people don't enjoy shopping at all if they do online shopping. In conclusion,
although
 traffic can reduce by doing everything online , it may show detrimental effects on public
life
. They towant enjoy or have fun in their
life
 but by doing online things , they may feel caged their self in homes
Submitted by grewalpt1249 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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