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Band 4

The continued ride in the world’s population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

#world’s #population #humanity #time #rise
Increasing
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An increasing
The increasing
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number
Correct article usage
the number
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 of the world
population
 is
more
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a more
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 serious risk for
earth
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the earth
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 than plastic pollution and increasing
tempretures
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temperatures
. Countries
such
 as India and China has
alredy
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already
 put strict laws to control their citizen
coundown
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countdown
could own
 as these are the
fastest growing
Add a hyphen
fastest-growing
show examples
nantions
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nations
. Increasing numbers of
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a citizen
the citizen
show examples
citizen
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citizens
show examples
 can
effects
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effect
show examples
 of
resourses
Correct your spelling
resources
 of the country. Issues
such
 as
a hunger
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hunger
a pang of hunger
show examples
 is
main
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the main
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 problem facing in Africa.
USA
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The USA
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 and many
devloped
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developed
 nations
helps
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help
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 poor lands by providing help but
this
 is not enough.
Main
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The main
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 reason
of
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for
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increasing
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the increasing
an increasing
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 number of
popullation
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population
 is ignorance of
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government
governmanet
Correct article usage
the governmanet
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 and people not knowing about
the
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apply
show examples
family
managemnt
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management
anf
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and
 its benefits. In
india
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India
show examples
, Today in many villages, people are still
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unaware
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unware
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unaware
show examples
 of the
probelms
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problems
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
occured
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occur
occurred
 with more
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
childern
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children
 they have
then
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than
show examples
 they should be.
This
 rise
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
population
 numbers can cause great problems to the world we live in. the Natural
resourses
Correct your spelling
resources
 are less,
however
, we are using
it
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them
show examples
 more than we should.
Factorys
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Factors
Factory
 which produce supplies for the peoples
Add the comma(s)
, on the other hand,
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on the other hand
this
are
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is
show examples
primery
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primary
 source of
harmfull
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harmful
 gasses. These
manifactruing
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manufacturing
 industries are working on 100% capacity yet they are not enough to provide enough goods to the people. It is predicted that by 2050 worlds
population
 will reach 10
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
,
futhermore
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furthermore
scientist
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Scientists
show examples
have
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has
show examples
 looking
ways
Change preposition
for ways
show examples
 to control medical crises that can not
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handle
handdle
Add a missing verb
be handdle
show examples
 with
current
Correct article usage
the current
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 numbers of doctors we have as per regulations. humanity have reached
moon
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the moon
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 and mars, but
serious
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the serious
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 problem we face is still
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
earth
Add an article
the earth
show examples
 which is
Correct your spelling
overpopulation
show examples
over
Correct your spelling
overpopulation
show examples
population
 is the main factor.
Submitted by homegardener on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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