IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #technology #aspects #lives #home #leisure #work #activities
In the
last
 few
Change to a plural noun
years
show examples
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
 there
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been changes in
life
 especially
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 activities
of
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
, free time and work
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
information
 technology. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will examine both the positive and negative aspects of
this
. On the one hand, many benefits from technology improve
people
life
.
First
 of all, a lot of inventions and
softwares
Correct your spelling
software
 totally make
people
 better off since the functions and abilities can improve
people
life
.
For example
, computers help everyone to access
information
 easier than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past, resulting in reducing time and cost to do leisure and work both at home and office.
Moreover
, technology creates
penty
Correct your spelling
plenty
 of chances in
life
such
 as
people
 can find jobs easily and quickly because of online hiring websites and
every body
Correct your spelling
everybody
show examples
 can gain more income from the new types of works which is trader,
rider
Add an article
a rider
the rider
show examples
 who send many things.
Furthermore
,
On the other hand
, innovations can
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 several drawbacks in
daily
Add an article
the daily
show examples
life
 of
people
. losing privacy is the
first
 cons of
people
 since many platforms and applications collect a lot of
information
 from users and in some
countries
Add a comma
,countries
show examples
 there are
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
 news reported about citizens
was
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
 tricked by
Add an article
a company
the company
show examples
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
 that sold personal
information
 or data leaked from their platform, leading to scammers can reach to them easier.
Lastly
, wasting a long period of time on social or applications with a loaded of data. To illustrate, there are massive unuseful
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
 on online platforms and everyone are likely to give
Fix the agreement mistake
attention
show examples
attentions
Correct your spelling
attention
show examples
 to them more or less. To sum up, it is true that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technologies
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
 living
life
 in
difference
Replace the word
different
show examples
 ways not only at home but
also
Change preposition
in work
show examples
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
.
However
, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages since it can
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 more effect and some of
flaws
Add an article
the flaws
show examples
 can reduce easily. If everyone used them
in appropriate
Correct your spelling
inappropriate
show examples
 ways, their
Correct your spelling
lives
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
 and communities would develop in great areas.
Submitted by chotika.cloud on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: