Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #technology #aspects #lives #home #leisure #work #activities

In the

last

few

Change to a plural noun

years

show examples

year

Add a comma

,year

show examples

there

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

been changes in

life

especially

Change preposition

show examples

activities

Change preposition

show examples

home

Add an article

the home

show examples

, free time and work

Change preposition

with

show examples

information

technology. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will examine both the positive and negative aspects of

this

. On the one hand, many benefits from technology improve

people

life

First

of all, a lot of inventions and

softwares

Correct your spelling

software

totally make

people

better off since the functions and abilities can improve

people

life

For example

, computers help everyone to access

information

easier than

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

past, resulting in reducing time and cost to do leisure and work both at home and office.

Moreover

, technology creates

penty

Correct your spelling

plenty

of chances in

life

such

people

can find jobs easily and quickly because of online hiring websites and

every body

Correct your spelling

everybody

show examples

can gain more income from the new types of works which is trader,

rider

Add an article

a rider

the rider

show examples

who send many things.

Furthermore

On the other hand

, innovations can

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

several drawbacks in

daily

Add an article

the daily

show examples

life

people

. losing privacy is the

first

cons of

people

since many platforms and applications collect a lot of

information

from users and in some

countries

Add a comma

,countries

show examples

there are

many

Replace the quantifier

much

show examples

news reported about citizens

was

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

tricked by

Add an article

a company

the company

show examples

company

Fix the agreement mistake

companies

show examples

that sold personal

information

or data leaked from their platform, leading to scammers can reach to them easier.

Lastly

, wasting a long period of time on social or applications with a loaded of data. To illustrate, there are massive unuseful

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

on online platforms and everyone are likely to give

Fix the agreement mistake

attention

show examples

attentions

Correct your spelling

attention

show examples

to them more or less. To sum up, it is true that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technologies

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

living

life

difference

Replace the word

different

show examples

ways not only at home but

also

Change preposition

in work

show examples

work place

Correct your spelling

workplace

show examples

However

, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages since it can

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

more effect and some of

flaws

Add an article

the flaws

show examples

can reduce easily. If everyone used them

in appropriate

Correct your spelling

inappropriate

show examples

ways, their

Correct your spelling

lives

lifes

Correct your spelling

lives

show examples

and communities would develop in great areas.

Submitted by chotika.cloud on Wed Jan 05 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
35Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

306 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?
It is notable that the majority of victual goods contain an immense amount of carbohydrates which contributes several health issues such as diabetes and obesity. It is believed that by increasing the prices of manufactured sugary products, people will tend to tone down their sugar intake. From my point of view, I think this is not a good idea and disagree that such an imposition on sugar-sweetened food and drink.
7
band
Some people feel that the responsibility for providing education should be borne only by the government and that private education should be banned. What are the main advantages of banning private education? Are there any circumstances ehre private education should be allowed? What is your own opinion on the matter?
It is a well-known fact that education has been the most essential in people's lives throughout history. Nowadays, it is provided by both public and private schools. Some people feel that the responsibility for providing education should be held up by the government and private studies should be banned. However, there are circumstances where the private school should be encouraged. In this essay, we will discuss both points with relevant examples and evidence.
7
band
Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. How do you think has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages of relying to much on technology?
These days, modern technology is widely used in the majority of workplaces. In my opinion, this has helped companies to save a lot of money; nevertheless, there are some disadvantages that can be noted when they depend on technology too much.
6
band
Some people argue that it is the responsibility of the police to educate children about good behavior, whereas others believe that parents should be responsible for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In our contemporary era, it is acknowledged by some people that moral ethics need to be educated by the police, whereas others argue that families should take care of behavioural education of their children. In my opinion, child development starts at the early stage in families and parents should be responsible to teach what is good or bad, in addition, educational institutions should collaborate with them at middle and high school stages.
7
band
Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Recently, countries usually spend a lot of profit to educate young learners while there is a statement saying that it should be used to create more physical activities for the younger generations. The author strongly agrees that the government should be concerned more about the money used for free time activities of young people to help them improve their health and mentality.

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. How do you think has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages of relying to much on technology?

Some people argue that it is the responsibility of the police to educate children about good behavior, whereas others believe that parents should be responsible for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Too much emphasis is given for education of the young. More government money should be spent to free time activity of young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?