New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#technologies #children #time

Most

children

leisure time is shifting towards online or virtual meet from the physical presence. Even

adult

Fix the agreement mistake

adults

show examples

these days are on the verge of completely

shift

Wrong verb form

shifting

show examples

due to the advancement in technology. Shifting towards these new technologies have brought very pros and cons which are discussed as below which in order are explained below. On one hand,

children

nowadays are pretty much fast forward.

For instance

, on one of the surveys conducted by the information technology department in Kathmandu, they found that

children

below 5 years of age were found talking about the video calling feature of Facebook and their experience with their elder brother. Since

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they have significantly gained the experience of social media and had made its full use. Due to the same reason their life better now.

On the other hand

, the emergence of addiction is one of the concerning issues.

For example

, many

children

these days are stuck to their mobile phones

instead

of performing their day to activities.

This

had led to the emergence of serious issues and choas everything. After looking at both sides of a coin, there seems the problem of addiction due to overuse.

Therefore

children

with new technologies will benefit more benefitted if they use them under timed circumstances.

Submitted by umeshrajpandey1994 on Thu Jan 06 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

208 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Digital literacy
Cyberbullying
Sedentary lifestyle
Inappropriate content
Self-learning
Screen time
Social inequality
Enhanced communication
Creative expression
Educational resources

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New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

With a growing population, many people believe that we should focus on producing more GM food. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing this

The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap?

You are having a party and want to invite your friend from a different city.

You lost your driving licence and someone found it and sent it back to you. Write a letter to the finder. In your letter -describe why the licence is important to you -ask where he or she found it -offer how would vou like to thank him/her

Should the government support artists, such as musicians, writers, and painters? Is it economically beneficial or is it just a waste of money? Explain both views and give your own opinion.