IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

State an opinion. What can you do to help Armenia?

#armenia
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As a devoted Armenian, I am desperate to help my
country
Use synonyms
 in every way I can.
Armenia
Use synonyms
 is currently suffering. I read the news ever so often and almost always fall into a depressed mood. I never thought I would say
this
Linking Words
, but my
country
Use synonyms
 is crumbling, and there is a high chance it will be gone soon if we don't do anything to help. We have to come together as a community to protest, donate and stand up for our
country
Use synonyms
, OUR
Armenia
Use synonyms
. The
next
Linking Words
 time I go to
Armenia
Use synonyms
, I'm going to join
Armenia
Use synonyms
 Hero Project.
Armenia
Use synonyms
 Hero Project is an organization that provides soldiers at
Armenia
Use synonyms
's border and posts with food, clothes, and entertainment. I was scrolling on Instagram the other day and came across one of their posts. It was a video of some of the members and a handful of soldiers dancing. They stood shoulder to shoulder, heads high, with smiles. They looked proud, and I saw hope in that video, and it made me smile for a
second
Linking Words
 but frown the
next
Linking Words
. These kids were smiling now, but little would they know they wouldn't be the
next
Linking Words
 day. Those temporary smiles hurt me. So, because of that, I have made a promise to myself that I will help
Armenia
Use synonyms
 at every chance I get starting with the
Armenia
Use synonyms
 Hero Project. You see, my ninth-grade teacher, Mrs Azizian, is one of the founders of the organization. With that, I have a higher chance of being admitted into the group. My heart and soul belong in
Armenia
Use synonyms
. Being there makes me feel safe and comfortable. That feeling of landing in Erevan knowing I'm back home is pure happiness.
That is
Linking Words
 when my smile is genuine. I feel like a free person, my true self, if you may.
Armenia
Use synonyms
 provides
this
Linking Words
 sort of peace and tranquillity for me, an indescribable feeling. In conclusion,
Armenia
Use synonyms
, my home, is in devastating condition, and we need to come together to help it in any way. Most importantly, we need to want to help. You can not force someone to help because it won't be genuine. We need to help with love, faith, and hope. We need to stay strong for our
country
Use synonyms
 and for the amazing soldiers we have and have lost.
Submitted by sargsyan_armine on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: