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Writing Samples
Band 8

Today people are living longer so they should have to work longer. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #work
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Experts throughout the world have argued that
people
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 must do jobs for a long period because these days they are existing longer.
This
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 essay completely disagrees with the statement. In my opinion,
people
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 are not living a long
life
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 in
this
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 generation when compared to the past, at the same time it is not necessary that they have to
work
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 for an extended period of time throughout their living.
This
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 essay will discuss my views and my opinion in detail with relevant examples.
Firstly
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, today many of us are leading a sedentary lifestyle which is unhealthy.
This
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 is to say that most of our existence is dependent on convenience foods that are rich in fat and salt which in turn causes serious health issues
such
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 as heart disease, obesity, and so on.
Therefore
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, our lifespan has reduced significantly than in the past.
For instance
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, many studies had proved that our overall lifespan had declined to 60 years. These days, it is uncommon to find
people
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 living in the age of '80s and '90s.
In addition
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, due to
this
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 modern culture,
people
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 are not interested in hardworking jobs and they are more involved to perform smart jobs to earn a handsome income.
Secondly
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, even though they live longer, they are no longer required to
work
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 for their survival. It is to say that most of them had their self-retirement pension plans that would send money for their needs to continue their living in old age.
Furthermore
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, the government in many developed countries had introduced benefit systems for the senior
people
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 and unemployed masses which they could use to pay for their major
life
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 expenses.
For example
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, some consensual reports had declared that 30% of residents were leading their
life
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 based on the state benefit system.
As a result
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, it is no longer a requirement for
people
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 to
work
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 throughout their
life
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. To conclude, an unhealthy lifestyle is not allowing civilians to live longer. Even though they live longer, it is not a need for them to
work
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 because of the government benefits which would support their living.
Submitted by jeeanay on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • intrinsic preference
  • liberating
  • physical activity
  • chronic diseases
  • natural light
  • job satisfaction
  • environmental connection
  • monotonous
  • dynamic
  • stimulating
  • fulfilling career
  • creativity
  • inspire
  • office politics
  • corporate structures
What to do next:
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