Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

While many
people
claim that
money
and
appearance
are more crucial, others believe that
success
comes from persistence and hard
work
.
This
essay will discuss both views and point out my opinion. On the one hand, there are many reasons why some
people
argue that
money
and
appearance
play a vital role in attaining accomplishment.
Firstly
,
people
born in affluent families tend to have a firm foundation of finance which can help them easily develop themselves. To be specific, a man whose father is a financier can open a company without borrowing
money
from the bank.
Secondly
,
appearance
is the key to
success
in some fields, namely entertainment and fashion. To be detailed, a well-groomed singer always draws much attention from the audiences;
therefore
, her career is bright and she might achieve
success
soon. To abridge,
money
and
appearance
partly result in achievement.
On the other hand
, I am
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
the opinion that hard
work
and determination are key factors to succeeding.
Firstly
, not every
people
have the fortune to be born into wealthy families or have a gorgeous
appearance
;
therefore
, they have to
work
utterly hard.
For example
, Nick Vujicic, who does not have four limbs, has become an influencer worldwide after a long period of practising writing without hands and doing sports without legs.
Secondly
,
success
rarely comes without determination.
For instance
, Thomas Edison had done thousands of experiments before inventing light bulbs. To abridge, I believe that accomplishment is willing to come from hard
work
and persistence. In conclusion, many
people
believe that
success
comes from diligence and perseverance, while others claim that finance base and beauty play a vital role in attaining accomplishment. I am on the opinion of the former belief.
Submitted by nhilm.lymannhi on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
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