Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #success #life #work #determination #factors #money #appearance

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this

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world,

people

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have their own explanations of what is a successful

life

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. Some

people

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support the idea that working hard and

determination

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on their

goals

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can lead to a successful

life

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, while others believe that one's wealth and

appearance

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are of utmost importance to a perfect

life

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. In

this

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essay, I will discuss

this

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topic from both arguments and conclude with my personal opinion. Some say hard work and

determination

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are two important factors that contribute to having a successful

life

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. Hard-working guarantees that

people

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have a stable income, which they can easily support their family.

For example

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, the public servants in Taiwan enjoy their

life

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because they do not need to worry about

money

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. The other contributor is

determination

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. Without it,

people

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are almost impossible to achieve their

goals

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;

as a result

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, they disappoint themselves.

Therefore

Linking Words

determination

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and hard work are important factors in one's

life

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However

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, only

money

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and

appearance

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can help

people

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be successful in their

life

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, claim others.

Money

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, indubitably, plays a crucial role in every aspect of

people

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's daily activities, ranging from paying an education fee, raising a family and having entertainment, to receiving medical treatment. It is hard to imagine how miserable a person will be without a decent payment. A good

appearance

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, the other key factor, can make

people

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's lives easier because humans have a tendency to good looking things.

For example

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, when two employees with similar backgrounds look for the same job, usually the one who has a better

appearance

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will be hired. Thereby,

this

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is why some individuals say

appearance

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is the foundation of a successful

life

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. In conclusion, while some consider hardworking and

determination

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the key elements to a successful

life

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due to a stable income and a higher chance of achieving their

goals

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, others prefer fortune and

appearance

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more because of their necessity and advantages. From my perspective, I agree with the former argument aforementioned and think that

money

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might be important to our

life

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, but it cannot lead us to a happy

life

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Instead

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, we can really feel satisfied with ourselves when we achieve our

life

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goals

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Submitted by champincloud on Sun Jan 09 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

351 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

perseverance
discipline
resilience
effort
tenacity
external factors
financial resources
favorable appearance
perceptions
advantages
intrinsic
extrinsic
sustainable
facilitating
undeniable

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Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Protecting the Environment is the responsibility of the government. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.