Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world

Nowadays it is considered a sharing of

information

particularly

pay

Wrong verb form

paid

show examples

attention to and

hide

Wrong verb form

hidden

show examples

by some people, while others argue that it is a necessity to share them. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

both views will be discussed and my opinion will be approached. On the one hand, some people think that some

information

should be secret,

therefore

officials hide knowledge about scientific research, business and the academic

world

For instance

, if a mechanical engineer discovers something, she goes to copyright her invention, and all data is not shared with anyone.

Other

Change the wording

Another

show examples

example is

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the stock market. Stock sharing

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

is very confidential on trade.

Stockbroker

Add an article

A stockbroker

The stockbroker

show examples

is a financial professional who buys and sells stocks at the direction of clients. If one

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

has business

information

shared

Add a missing verb

is shared

show examples

with another who is not relevant, his attitude is problematic.

On the other hand

, increasing transparency in significant areas helps to solve global problems more quickly.

For example

, after

Covid-19

Correct article usage

the Covid-19

show examples

vaccination was discovered,

Dr.

Change the punctuation

show examples

Ozlem Tureci and

Dr.

Change the punctuation

show examples

Ugur Sahin who is CEO of BioNTech shared an affordable vaccine that the rest of the

world

, the pandemic would end soon. In my estimation, their kindly

demeanor

Change the spelling

demeanour

show examples

serves as a good model to other scientists. In conclusion, there are some things in which scientific work, business and the academic

world

are important for the future.

Information

occupies an important place in technological development. In my opinion,

although

there have to be some restrictions,

information

can be shared as much as possible in order for the

world

to be better if people share their knowledge with each other.

Submitted by alkanyilmaz90 on Thu Jan 13 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

information sharing
scientific research
business
academic world
advancement of knowledge
progress
collaboration
cross-disciplinary research
open access
democratization of information
transparency
credibility
intellectual property
security concerns
commercial interests

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
The increasing presence of multinational companies and globalization is believed by some to have positive implications for everyone involved. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is a growing tendency for globalized corporations. Some people harbour a belief that the phenomenon will bring advantages to people. I am inclined to stand neutrally with the statement since it provides multiple possibilities and results in competitive working environments in the meantime. A discussion of this issue as well as my thoughts will be highlighted in the write-up.
4.5
band
A large company In your area has decided to spend a certain amount of money, either to sponsor a local children 's sports team for two years, or to pay for two open-air concerts. it has asked for feedback from the general public. Write a letter to the company.in your letter : •describe the benefits of sponsoring the sports team •summarise the benefits of paying for the concerts •say how you think the company should spend the money
I would like to express my appreaation for your decision to spend Money For the benefit of our community - either to spnd a local Juvenile sports team or to arrange two concerts.
5.5
band
In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should have the responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Child obesity is becoming a common concern in most areas of the world. It is often argued that in most nations children are consuming unhygienic foods which is the leading cause of being overweight. However, some believe that to limit this issue the ministry should take strict steps to limit the growing challenge. In my opinion, it does not only depend on the government but parents also play a crucial role. Therefore I disagree with this statement, that the regime is only responsible.
7
band
Some people think that the government should provide free housing, while others think that it is not the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Home is often considered a warm harbour where our bodies and minds find respite. The question of whether the authority should provide free or affordable housing to residents has sparked a contentious debate. Both sides of this argument have valid points, In my view, the government and residents should share a certain level of responsibility in housing issues.
4.5
band
Some people think that going to a fitness centers regularly is unnecessary. Instead they believe the combining occasional exercise (such as going for walk) with a balanced diet is enough to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
The necessities of working out is readily apparent to people. Due to diverse ways of exercising, the manner of doing is point of contention. Despite of increasing the number of gyms, non-necessity of going to sport center is advocated for being healthy. By considering all opposite aspects of gym, this essay discusses my proponent of its benefits.

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The increasing presence of multinational companies and globalization is believed by some to have positive implications for everyone involved. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should have the responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the government should provide free housing, while others think that it is not the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that going to a fitness centers regularly is unnecessary. Instead they believe the combining occasional exercise (such as going for walk) with a balanced diet is enough to stay healthy. To what extent do you agree or disagree.