IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In some places, young people find it difficult to communicate with older people. Why is this? What are the solutions?

#places #people
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In many countries, there is a communication rift between the older and younger generations.
This
Linking Words
 is a natural phenomenon and the solution is for both sides to compromise. The old and young often cannot communicate well because of major differences in perspective. It is natural that older
people
Use synonyms
 will have a more mature outlook and younger
people
Use synonyms
 be more radical in their views. A good example of
this
Linking Words
 would be in Vietnam where the older generation holds very conservative, traditional views related to familial structures, careers, and social values that conflict with the more modern, progressive positions of the younger generation. Young
people
Use synonyms
 have heard the traditional arguments for years and want to rebel, often out of naivety. The older crowd have the benefit of experience and
feel
Correct subject-verb agreement
feels
show examples
 young
people
Use synonyms
 should follow their advice.
This
Linking Words
 basic antagonism underlies poor communication between the generations. The best solutions all rely on compromise. The young community ought to accept that their lack of life experience puts them at a disadvantage in understanding the world. Many of their opinions are premature and will evolve over time.
This
Linking Words
 implies that they should make greater efforts to understand the counsel of their elders. Their elders, in turn, must realise that their experiences are a small sample size from a unique time period. If,
for example
Linking Words
, they had to struggle to earn a living and raise a family, they must concede
this
Linking Words
 only a single instance that cannot be simplistically generalised.
Moreover
Linking Words
, times have changed and what was sound advice in the past,
maybe
Correct your spelling
may
show examples
 largely be irrelevant today. In conclusion, the old and young are in different life stages and naturally have contrasting mindsets and the best solutions require
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
self-reflective modesty from both demographics. In
this
Linking Words
 way, they will be able to learn more from each other.
Submitted by DA.11752 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Increase the depth of analysis in presenting arguments to fully address the prompt
coherence and cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay to enhance coherence

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological proficiency
  • communication gap
  • digital tools
  • worldviews
  • common ground
  • contemporary slang
  • informal language
  • misunderstandings
  • social hierarchy
  • cultural norms
  • stereotypes
  • prejudices
  • open communication
  • out of touch
  • inexperienced
  • effective communication
  • intergenerational programs
  • cross-generational activities
  • mutual respect
  • active listening
What to do next:
Look at other essays: