Television dominates the free time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

#television #time #people

Television

is very popular in our daily life. Many

people

spend most of their leisure

time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

watching

television

and are reluctant to involve in exercising and social gathering. In

this

essay, I will explain why I agree with the mentioned situation. One of the reasons why

television

is so attractive to many

people

is that it has a wide range of programs, ranging from cartoons,

television

series to documentary programs, which would easily make

people

addicted.

For instance

dramas, like squid

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

show examples

, make

people

spend many hours on them.

People

tend to glue their eyes on

rather than going out for doing exercise or

meeting

Wrong verb form

meet

show examples

with their friends, just because they want to finish the

television

episode. As a consequence, we will become lazy and isolated from our friends.

Furthermore

, the pace of living in a modern city, like Hong Kong, is pretty fast. Most citizens spend long working hours and feel exhausted after a day of

hectic

Add an article

a hectic

the hectic

show examples

life. They would prefer to have a relaxed and entertaining leisure

time

at home.

Television

is a good choice for them.

Also

, most

television

channels are open to the public for free, it may be one of the most economical leisure activities that even the grass root can afford to enjoy. That’s why

dominates

people

’s free

time

. In conclusion, in my opinion,

people

spend most of their

time

because it is very entertaining, enjoyable and inexpensive.

Moreover

, the busy and exhausted lifestyle makes

people

prefer to spend

time

television

Submitted by dfshum on Wed Jan 19 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Television dominates the free time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Others however say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required discuss both these views and give your own opinio

Some people feel that governments should take a large portion of people's salaries to pay for necessary public services such as roads and schools. Others feel that high taxes are a bad thing.

Many people nowadays spend a large of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that to protect local cultures, tourism should be banned in some areas, while others think that change is inevitable and banning tourism will have no benefits. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.