Some people believe that university students should pay all the cost of studies because university education only benefits students themselves not the society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With an increasing population paying more attention to the development in the spiritual aspect, the number of people studying in universities is more than before.
While
someone
Correct pronoun usage
Some
show examples
argues
Correct subject-verb agreement
argue
show examples
that governments and schools should not give financial
support
to
students
because of no benefits. I do not agree with
this
point to a large degree.
Firstly
, not all
students
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
afford the cost. As we all know, universities spend a large number of funds on not only purchasing experimental equipment but
also
doing surveys and affording teachers’ salaries as well.
Thus
, it is unrealistic to ask
students
to provide all financial
support
for these.
In addition
, there are still many
students
asking for student loans to continue their studies. If
students
are requested to pay the whole
costs
Fix the agreement mistake
cost
show examples
of studies, there might be someone who has to give up their academic education because of the shortage of finance.
Besides
, the public could
also
be benefited even
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
offer funds to the university.
In other words
, with the
support
of society,
students
would have a chance to get comprehensive skills. The more graduates well-educated, the more contribution they devote to societies, and
also
the more profits states could get from these people.
Furthermore
, considering the rapid development of a country, society has an obligation to offer
students
or schools financial
support
. In conclusion, it is inevitable that the community provides part of
fees
Correct article usage
the fees
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
people’s education. Not only is it helpful for people but is beneficial for any other aspects including society itself and the state.
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task response
Provide more relevant examples and data to support your points. Make sure to address all aspects of the topic more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices in order to improve the overall coherence of the essay.

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