Some people believe that university students should pay all the cost of studies because university education only benefits students themselves not the society as a whole. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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With an increasing population paying more attention to the development in the spiritual aspect, the number of people studying in universities is more than before.
While
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someone
Correct pronoun usage
Some
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argues
Correct subject-verb agreement
argue
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that governments and schools should not give financial
support
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to
students
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because of no benefits. I do not agree with
this
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point to a large degree.
Firstly
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, not all
students
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could
Wrong verb form
can
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afford the cost. As we all know, universities spend a large number of funds on not only purchasing experimental equipment but
also
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doing surveys and affording teachers’ salaries as well.
Thus
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, it is unrealistic to ask
students
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to provide all financial
support
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for these.
In addition
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, there are still many
students
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asking for student loans to continue their studies. If
students
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are requested to pay the whole
costs
Fix the agreement mistake
cost
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of studies, there might be someone who has to give up their academic education because of the shortage of finance.
Besides
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, the public could
also
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be benefited even
they
Correct word choice
if they
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offer funds to the university.
In other words
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, with the
support
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of society,
students
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would have a chance to get comprehensive skills. The more graduates well-educated, the more contribution they devote to societies, and
also
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the more profits states could get from these people.
Furthermore
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, considering the rapid development of a country, society has an obligation to offer
students
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or schools financial
support
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. In conclusion, it is inevitable that the community provides part of
fees
Correct article usage
the fees
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to
Change preposition
for
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people’s education. Not only is it helpful for people but is beneficial for any other aspects including society itself and the state.
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task response
Provide more relevant examples and data to support your points. Make sure to address all aspects of the topic more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices in order to improve the overall coherence of the essay.
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