Many people today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?

#people #home

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In the present day, with the advance of technology, many people find a variety of solutions to feel safer,

however

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, one part of them still

feel

Correct subject-verb agreement

feels

show examples

deprotected. The safety of citizens ought to be a field with more investment in order to build a better society. Because of

this

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, it is essential to understand the possible causes to solve

this

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problem with efficient solutions. First and foremost,

due to

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the increase of violence in many centres, mainly in metropolitan cities, the majority of individuals feel unsafe both at home and outside.

For instance

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according to

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research published by Harvard University, 73% of American citizens save money to invest in personal safety and security. So one effective solution to address

this

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current situation is the investment in state-of-the-art equipment related to security

such

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as video, cameras, alarms, and electronic systems surveillance.

Secondly

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, another possible reason for

this

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hardship is the amount of negative information posted on social media.

Moreover

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, because of the pandemic, the number of detrimental information doubled in the

last

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two years. Take a survey carried out by The New York Times as an example, it says that the likelihood of mental disorders in people who consume

this

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content is three times higher.

Therefore

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, one possible solution to overcome the difficulties raised by

this

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problem is to mitigate the usage of social media.

Finally

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, some individuals may present mental disorders and psychological problems

such

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as anxiety and schizophrenia which can lead to the increase of fear related to safety.

Furthermore

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, these situations are like a vicious circle, if they do not be treated, they will become more prevalent. So for these reasons, a convenient answer is therapy and medical treatment so as to recover the quality of life. In conclusion, fear has become present among individuals regardless of motivation,

however

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, it is vital to find a solution in order to maintain a daily routine without more setbacks and hardships since people need not only to stay at home but

also

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go outside.

In other words

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, both ambiences are necessary for our lives.

Submitted by larissafelipin on Fri Jan 21 2022

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coherence and cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the causes and solutions to the issue of safety, but needs to ensure a clearer introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

Your response addresses the task effectively and provides relevant examples, but ensure that all the main points are fully developed and comprehensive ideas are presented clearly.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

343 words

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Many people today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?

As parents, they should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well and give them a better environment for growth. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The best way / the only way to reduce poverty(INDIVIDUALS / GOVERNMENT) in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country.