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Writing Samples
Band 6

Parents put a lot of pressure on children to succeed. Do you think this is good or bad?

#parents #pressure #children
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Pressurising youngsters by their wards to pave the path for success is very often seen in
this
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 contemporary epoch. I am of the view, that teenagers should not be forced to do something in their lives, while sometimes in rare scenarios they may be pushed to do so.
To begin
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 with, when there is more burden on the shoulders of juveniles they are more likely to embrace success in their life.
In other words
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, adolescents need to succeed in their lives for a thriving career ahead
instead
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 of wasting
time
Use synonyms
 on irrelevant activities. To explicate, they should know the significance of
time
Use synonyms
 to achieve their goals by utilizing their skills rather than employing them on unfruitful tasks. Very often it happens at a young age that they are not aware of the malicious activities in which they are involved, owing to their friend circle because of which they waste their energy and
time
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
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, sometimes it becomes incumbent on parents to take stringent action to leave them towards the ladder of accomplishment.
However
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, by creating pressure every
time
Use synonyms
 we cannot make them in a position to become independent and take decisions judiciously which is detrimental for their future. To elaborate, they may take decisions in their life by reaching
instantly
Correct pronoun usage
them instantly
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, which has a disastrous outcome due to which they can spoil their career. According to a study conducted by the University of Columbia, the number of suicides among the youth has increased by 12
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 only because they do not have a cordial atmosphere at their home. Thereby, by doing
this
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 the relations between the progenitors and children
also
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 deteriorate with
time
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. To conclude, in
this
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 day and age the idea of creating pressure on the youngsters to make them successful is completely preposterous, while in rare cases
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 if they are involved in unproductive activities parents can take the charge and become vigilant on them.
Submitted by kapoorankur64 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • academic excellence
  • extracurricular activities
  • prosperous future
  • societal standards
  • peer competition
  • motivation
  • discipline
  • unfulfilled ambitions
  • resource availability
  • opportunity exploitation
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