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Band 7

Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #university #study #lack #workers #electricians #plumbers
Nowadays, a large number of
people
 study academic subjects at university
instead
 of attending
/
taking part in
/
partaking in vocational training courses. While I accept that a university degree is
also
 essential and beneficial, I totally agree that we should encourage
people
 to become qualified
workers
,
such
 as electricians or plumbers. There are two important reasons why more vocationally trained
workers
 are required.
Firstly
, when buildings are constructed or repaired, a source of electricians, plumbers, or other trades is vital.
For example
, material facilities in some key fields,
such
 as hospitals, schools, or museums, usually need to be expanded or maintained. Having trained
workers
 operate
such
/
those kinds of work can not only ensure the safety of the buildings but
also
 lead to an improvement in the quality of life of the whole community.
Secondly
, there are too many academic graduates in the same major in some countries every year.
Consequently
, the proportion of graduate unemployment is increasing each year significantly as well.
Therefore
, some countries need to ensure that extra vocational training is provided. More
people
 should be encouraged to attend career-oriented courses
/
on-the-job training to meet society's needs. The schools should not just focus on exam-driven curriculum, which is found to be quite impractical and disheartens
/
demotivates students when they have low grades. Schools,
therefore
, must make changes in the curriculum and provide workshops to teach practical skills. Parents should
also
 encourage their children to find out their gifts and explain the good job prospects to inspire them to choose vocational careers. In conclusion, I agree that it is essential that we encourage more
people
 to attend vocational training due to the fact that the more qualified
workers
 meet society's needs, the more our society can function effectively.
Submitted by jupiter_venus2020 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • skilled workers
  • vocational training
  • academic study
  • qualified
  • electricians
  • plumbers
  • technicians
  • hands-on experience
  • job market
  • infrastructure
  • economy
  • unemployment rates
  • consumer spending
  • educational paths
  • job satisfaction
  • societal resilience
  • versatile workforce
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