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Band 2.5

It is more important for schoolchildren to learn about local history than world history Do you agree or disagree?

#schoolchildren #history #world
History
 has
functional
Add an article
a functional
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 impact on
childrens'
Correct your spelling
children's
show examples
 education. I totally disagree, with the idea that learning only local
history
 has more advantages than studying
world
history
, because of
of
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
benefits it brings
such
 as expanding
children
's
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
show examples
 and having an advantage for their future
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
.
Firstly
, I would argue that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Foreign
History
 is one of the most powerful facilitators in
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
 worldview. Studying the
world
's
history
 helps
children
 to expand
Correct pronoun usage
their horizon
show examples
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
show examples
, they can learn to accept divergent cultures and customs that exist, making life more interesting.
Secondly
, it would be wrong to neglect the learning of
world
history
. As the
world
 has become more open now, and today's global
children
 should have
an information
Remove the article
information
a piece of information
show examples
 about foreign countries.
For instance
,
children
 who have some data about other countries'
history
, can easily find a better job from the place that they well know and want to live. In conclusion, as the two analyzed reasons above, I strongly disagree with the idea that only
local
Change the article
a local
show examples
history
 is an important tool for
children
.
Submitted by mrusmanovjavokhir on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • heritage
  • cultural identity
  • ancestry
  • traditions
  • globalization
  • empathy
  • contemporary issues
  • integrate
  • perspective
  • civilization
  • diversity
  • innovations
  • historical significance
  • nationalism
  • cosmopolitanism
  • historiography
  • geopolitical
What to do next:
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