IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Government should spend money on medical research and less on researching the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #money #research #environment
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There is a controversial perspective heating a debate over the fact that whether all medicine can help inhabitants to have healthy activity
instead
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 of researching the environmental issues to advance the community's activity. In my opinion, I strongly support the view that the government should raise cash on medical research and less on research on the environment.
Firstly
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, medical is the essence of all the people around the world, for upgrade the standard of living
such
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 as the strength, the social safety. The demand for medicine and health is essential that can help people to live longer, have a better
life
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. So that, we need a healthy growth to work, do the daily routine that to satisfy us all the things we want in the
life
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.
For example
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, health is the essence of
life
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that is
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 a part of
life
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 to do everything inactivity.
Secondly
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, the issues of the environment are indispensable to daily
life
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, but it is as not important as medical. We can not eradicate all the facilities to improve the issues of climate that it is essential to serve the daily
life
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 and the demand of agriculture and daily routine in the
life
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. So that,
instead
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 of spending money on researching the climate, we must use it in medical research that can improve the inhabitants' health and prevent us from epidemic and serious diseases. In conclusion, not only medical is an essential part of
life
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 but
also
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 it can upgrade the standard of living.
Hence
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, the government should spend less money on researching the environment and more money on medical exploration to raise the standard of living of the people in their country.
Submitted by juliethaonguyen1993 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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