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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people argue that in order to improve educational quality , high school students should encouraged to question and offer criticism on their teachers. Other think this will lead to a loss of respect and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both views and your own opinion.

#people #quality #school #students #offer #criticism #teachers #loss #respect #discipline #classroom
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It should be noted that there are advantages and disadvantages when in a high school
students
Use synonyms
 should
encouraged
Change the verb form
encourage
be encouraged
show examples
 to questions and offer criticism on their
teachers
Use synonyms
 .As a matter of fact
that
Correct word choice
apply
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,
this
Linking Words
 argument
regarded
Add a missing verb
is regarded
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 as a significantly vital difficult situation for educational curriculum . As far as I know that , Nowadays
leaners
Correct your spelling
learners
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 are becoming
more and more well
Replace the words
better and better
better
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 - educated than some of the
teacher
Change to a plural noun
teachers
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in
Add the comma(s)
, in this case,
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this
Linking Words
 case the
leaners
Correct your spelling
learners
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had been feeling dissatisfied with
teachers
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technique
Fix the agreement mistake
techniques
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 and
strategy
Fix the agreement mistake
strategies
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,
besides
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, lack of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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expertise when they teach
students
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 in recent years .
In
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addition
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,addition
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 the main purpose
criticize
Change the verb form
criticizes
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 the educators by their
students
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 .
Becouse
Correct your spelling
Because
teachers
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 must be
adapt
Correct your spelling
adept
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 and of
course
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,course
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 modify the traditional approaches
lesson
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 which dominated teacher at the
lesson
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 so it is unproductive for
students
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that is
Linking Words
 why they must sort out the
lesson
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 into modern approaches as it were when
students
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 would be dominated at the
lesson
Use synonyms
accordingly
Linking Words
 it is more effective and successful for both of them. Turning to the other side of the argument to give self -sufficient for
leaners
Correct your spelling
learners
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 it comes terrible contributes for their behaviour
Add the comma(s)
, for instance,
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for instance
Linking Words
 the importance of these conditions
students
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 should not be underestimated in response ti
teachers
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 even they intentionally revenge for their bad marks ,
furthermore
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such
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 kind of complaints affect to reduce their salary and to decline
teachers
Use synonyms
 reputation in their job.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
,Meanwhile
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 scholars have shown
a
Remove the article
apply
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total disrespect for them. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
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 we should take into account " golden mean " I guess we should give freedom to them
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to show their interests and abilities, certainly not to criticize
teachers
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 .
However
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 simultaneously
teachers
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 have to improve knowledge and modify their practical expertise
thus
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 tactics too.
Submitted by uluga2002 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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