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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The first smartphone was invented in 1992. By the year 2023 there may be as many as 2.5 billion smartphones in the world. The use of smartphones is decreasing our intelligence because we are reliant on the technology and not our own minds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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The development of
technology
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 and the invention of
smartphones
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 specifically have changed our
lives
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 in a
way
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 that no one could think of. Our reliance on these devices is increasingly growing and we are approaching a situation where we cannot do a single job without using our
smartphones
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. Some believe that the
use
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 of them makes our minds become slow and decrease our intelligence. But I want to illustrate why I think the advantages of
this
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 growing
technology
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 overcome its disadvantages. A majority of experts think that the increasing
use
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 of these electronic devices is affecting our young generation the most, and without proper supervision, it can cost their mental health and make them dependent on them rapidly. As I mentioned the problem is not the using
smartphones
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 itself, but the necessity of being supervised by an adult and being told about the correct usage of them. In
this
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 ,
way
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 our children will benefit from the advantages and prepare for living in a
technology
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-dependence world. Other than that we cannot overlook the fact how much
smartphones
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 have made our
lives
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 easier in various aspects. They totally have changed our
way
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 of communication with each other, in a
way
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 that no one could even imagine.
On the other hand
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, they can provide us with too much information through the internet and keep us up-to-date. It is a possibility which was not available in the past and, we need to
use
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 it if we do not want to fall behind the others in our studies and works. In conclusion,
smartphones
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 are a newly invented
technology
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 and like any other
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technology
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,technology
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 there are some initial worries about them. They have changed our
lives
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 greatly and probably there are other changes on the
way
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. We cannot delete them from our everyday
lives
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, So the only practical answer to these worries and not become extremely dependent on them and maybe addicted to them is to learn how to properly
use
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 them. With enough ,knowledge we can benefit from its significant advantages without any destructive consequences.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • collective intelligence
  • reliant on technology
  • problem-solving
  • problem-solving
  • cognitive skills
  • critical thinking
  • knowledge acquisition
  • connectivity
  • knowledge sharing
  • cognitive overload
  • memory retention
  • brain-training apps
  • digital literacy
  • multitask
  • attention span
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