Nowadays environmental problems are too big to be managed by individual persons or individual countries. In other words, it is an international problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Environmental destruction has become one of the most pressing/ urgent/ alarming problems facing/ plaguing individuals and
countries
.
However
, I believe it cannot be solved by any country alone and requires// calls for global cooperation/ collaboration due to the scale of the environmental impacts and the limited capacities of an individual country/ government. Environmental preservation demands concerted/ collaborative
efforts
/ actions of all
countries
→ concerted
efforts
/ actions on
global
Correct article usage
a global
show examples
level// concerted global
efforts
/ actions because the consequences of environmental damage affect the entire
world
.
Natural
Add an article
The natural
show examples
environment is an interconnected system where each component/ element, ranging from air and soil to micro-organisms and human beings,
link
Change the form of the verb
linked
show examples
closely to each other.
Therefore
, when one element is severely damaged, the global environment will deteriorate, resulting in/ causing/ inflicting worldwide pollution,
biodiversity → ecosystem
Add a hyphen
biodiversity-ecosystem
show examples
degradation and climate change.
For example
, tropical deforestation contributes to
rise
Correct article usage
the rise
show examples
in global temperature and change in
world
precipitation patterns, which have led to/ inflicted floods, tornados and droughts affecting many parts of the
world
.
Furthermore
, without international coordination → cooperation/ collaboration,
efforts
/ endeavors/ attempts to protect/ preserve the global environment cannot come to fruition/ be effective. Developing
countries
are culpable/ responsible for a significant proportion of
world
greenhouse gases emissions
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they still heavily rely on fossil fuels as a main source of energy to develop the economy. If there is no international consensus on curbing global warming, the authorities of these
countries
will neither be under pressure to wean their
countries
off coal, oil and natural gas and switch to clean renewable energy
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
nor will they gain technological, financial and other support from developing
countries
to do so.
Consequently
, no matter how much
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
/
endeavors
Fix the agreement mistake
endeavor
show examples
/
attempts
Fix the agreement mistake
attempt
show examples
other parts of the
worlds
Fix the agreement mistake
world
show examples
make to tackle climate change, their
efforts
/ attempts will be futile//
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
efforts
will be nullified/ negated/ countervailed/ neutralized. In conclusion,
countries
need to cooperate in order to tackle major environmental issues effectively because these issues inflict damage on the entire
world
and are beyond the capabilities of any individual government.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • collective action
  • climate change
  • rising sea levels
  • extreme weather events
  • biodiversity loss
  • ecosystems
  • Convention on Biological Diversity
  • significant improvements
  • sovereignty
  • environmental policies
  • international collaboration
  • environmental degradation
  • shared responsibility
  • technological advances
  • innovative solutions
  • international cooperation
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