In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should have the responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #children #people #government #responsibility

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Nowadays, one of the controversial topics that most of us are discussing is obesity and the unhealthiness of

children

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. Most of the time it is arguable that governments have to take responsibility for

this

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In contrast

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, I totally disagree with

this

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statement and I am going to describe a few points behind my argument in my essay.

Firstly

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children

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are closer to their parents and they have to control their diet. Because of

this

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, adults can provide them with more healthy

food

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on a daily basis, rather than junk

food

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food

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with other harmful preservatives.

For instance

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, we can see many television and YouTube advertisements

which are promoting

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that promote

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fast-

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fast food

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food

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and unhealthy

food

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items. By seeing these types of commercials

children

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tend to ask for these types of diets from their parents.

However

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, adults can advise them of the harm that can occur by consuming these and guide them to proper diet habits from the infant stage.

Moreover

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, guardians have to direct their

child

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to do more physical activities

such

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as running, swimming or Gymnastics which helps to get a better metabolic system. Most of the countries have

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children

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children's

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parks and jogging or cycle tracks. Society can gain the advantage for the betterment of their

child

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's health.

In addition

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, these types of activities will help the mental health of the

child

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since they can spend time with nature.

Furthermore

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, if

children

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can be directed by the adults for exercise on a routine basis it will be beneficial for their future as well.

To conclude

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, by going through the above points we can comprehend that, the predominant responsibility of

child

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health depends on the adult's direction, but not within the government's hands.

Submitted by susithapb on Sat Jan 29 2022

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Language

Refrain from using informal language such as 'us,' 'you,' 'most of the time,' and 'most of us' as it does not adhere to formal essay writing standards.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government should have the responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a report describing the information in the graph below. You should write at least 150 words. Writing task 1.

In some countries, there has beeenan increase in the number of parents who are choosin to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think we should do more to prevent crimes, while others believe that we can do little for this problem. Discuss both views and give your opinion.