Some countries are introducing an additional tax on drinks containing high levels of sugar due to the negative effects of consuming large amounts of sugar on people’s health. Should governments impose extra taxes to discourage people from consuming sugary drinks and prevent negative effects on people’s health or should it be people’s own responsibility?

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It is argued that
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
policy to get tax from sweet
drinks
Use synonyms
because it is
unhealty
Correct your spelling
unhealthy
for the
people
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
disagree that drinking habits
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
not only
people
Use synonyms
own responsibility, I do not
think
Add the particle
tothink
show examples
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
more money from them is the best way
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
could change their habit.
Increasing
Add an article
An increasing
The increasing
show examples
number of
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
for sugary
drinks
Use synonyms
is very problematic, in one side it could
be increase
Change the verb form
increase
show examples
the
price
Use synonyms
and make
people
Use synonyms
difficult to buy it, but on the other side
people
Use synonyms
who get addicted still tend to buy it and it will not stop them. For some
people
Use synonyms
, the rise of tax
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them very hard to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
drinks
Use synonyms
, because they do not have money enough to buy it.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
who love the drink very much and have more money will not stop because of the
price
Use synonyms
and still buy it while
it
Add a verb
isit
wasit
show examples
still reasonable.
For example
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
in Indonesia still buy
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
beer while the
price
Use synonyms
is doubled increase .
Thus
Linking Words
, for some
Use synonyms
people
Add a comma
,people
show examples
higher
price
Use synonyms
is not a problem, and could not stop them. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
some solution to make
people
Use synonyms
stop
to consume
Change the verb form
consuming
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sugary
drinks
Use synonyms
, two of them is
education
Use synonyms
from the school and publicity
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
. Some research show what
people
Use synonyms
do when they are in school could affect their adult
life
Use synonyms
, so
education
Use synonyms
about which one is
healty
Correct your spelling
healthy
or unhealthy must be introduced
since
Change preposition
at
show examples
younger age. Social
media
Use synonyms
is the big
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
show examples
in the current trends,
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
who see and follow the advertisement in social
media
Use synonyms
show promised things, so publication using social
media
Use synonyms
is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
effective way to decrease
people
Use synonyms
from sugary
drinks
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, healthy
life
Use synonyms
like running and cycling during di pandemic have been very hype
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
and can make
people
Use synonyms
follow it in the real
life
Use synonyms
. So, the proper
education
Use synonyms
and publication in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
could lead
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
leave
Add the particle
to leave
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sweet
drinks
Use synonyms
and start
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
healthy
life
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, to stop
people
Use synonyms
from getting obese because of the
drinks
Use synonyms
,
Correct your spelling
government
goverment
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
have to do more than increase the
price
Use synonyms
because the problem is not about the
price
Use synonyms
it is about their habit,
Linking Words
moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
show examples
give them more
education
Use synonyms
to be healthy using
education
Use synonyms
and some advertisements could make them change their
habbit
Correct your spelling
habit
habits
Submitted by ardiirtp on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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