Many of the medical problems that people are experiencing in today's world are due to the fact that wehave a very sedentary lifestyle.

#people #world #fact #wehave #lifestyle

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It is obvious that modern people are

fasing

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facing

varius

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various

health

problems

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and

deseases

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diseases

. Some individuals consider that

thisis

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this is

due to our inactive

lifestiyle

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lifestyle

. From my point of view, the reason can be considered as

oneof

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one of

the biggest

problems

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however

Linking Words

, we cannot ignore other more dangerous impacts that can easily cause sickness to our well-being

Firstly

Linking Words

, we should explain how

this

Linking Words

sedentary

lifestiye

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lifestyle

lifetime

happened. Due to the fast development of technology,

peoplenow

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people now

tend to rely on machines than doing

works

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work

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by themselves.

This

Linking Words

leads to a variety of dangerous

both

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apply

show examples

phisical

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physical

physically

andmental

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and mental

mental

health

problems

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such

Linking Words

as stress, sleeplessness, high

preassure

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pressure

, weak bones, overweight.

However

Linking Words

, there are other negative impacts caused by our daily background. For

instanse

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instance

, the environment has

beenpolluted

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been polluted

with toxic gasses, chemicals,

hence

Linking Words

people have to deal with different allergies.

Moreover

Linking Words

, individuals

wantto

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want to

purchase cheap food products and

this

Linking Words

has led to the cause of foodborne diseases. To summarize, I agree with the fact that

sedentary

Correct article usage

a sedentary

show examples

lifestyle is the cause of many medical

problems

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however

Linking Words

wecannot

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we can not

neglect other dangerous issues. All in all, I consider that we prioritize our health in any circumstances.

Submitted by icemarat6 on Sat Feb 05 2022

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

181 words

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Many of the medical problems that people are experiencing in today's world are due to the fact that wehave a very sedentary lifestyle.

Your opinion

it is more important for school children to learn about their local history than the world history. Do you agree or disagree?

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays the diferent between countries are becoming less evident because people follow the same media. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages.

Some individuals believe that higher education should be funded by the government.Others, however, argue that it ohs the responsibility of individuals to fund their education. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.