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Some people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Others think that people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #individuals #work
The
population
 has given emergence to severe and stark competition. Owing to
this
, employment, employability, employees, and employers are often spotted in a series of knots and
crosses
Correct subject-verb agreement
cross
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 networks. Some
people
 put forth that
one
 should be allowed to
work
 on their own accord till the time
one
 wants to,
while
 some proselytize that
one
 shouldn’t be permitted to be employed over the
age
 of 65 years. In the paragraphs to follow, I shall be enlightening both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
opinions and
would
Wrong verb form
will
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 peddle my thoughts as to why setting a threshold is essential in today’s era. As is known to all, our
population
 waves have been flowing up the brink of nature’s carrying capacities, and
this
 has caused umpteen issues and indispositions when it comes to management. The employment crisis is most certainly
one
 of them. To satiate and suffice the needs and desires of
one
’s family members and oneself,
one
 has to toil and drudge hard irrespective of what
age
 they are of.
Moreover
, the ailing
population
 index has caused strife among inhabitants of the world, where
one
 has to
work
one
’s fingers to the bone to make resources both available and attainable. In
such
 a scenario, it becomes all the more obstreperous when a household has only
one
 bread-earner.
In addition
 to that, some old-aged
people
work
 for their happiness and pleasure and
thus
, as some
people
 argue,
one
 shouldn’t be curbed from working past a certain
age
. In an entirely different direction, another pool of thought says that given
to
Change preposition
apply
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a heavy and tempestuous scarcity of resources and the paucity of job opportunities, a fair share of chance should be given to the younger generation, which
otherwise
 gets muffled in the fleet of experienced and senior employees. I somehow find myself swinging in the same direction. As the
population
 havoc has caused rifts across the populace, young
people
 are afflicted the most. In a corporate environment that generally keeps on hunting for seasoned professionals, the freshers generally have to settle and swallow the consolation amount against their tags that deem them
as
Change preposition
apply
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freshers. Taking a scenario wherein a family yet again has a sole penny-maker, they being relatively newer and novice in the field of their concerned stream makes them do nothing but
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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put up with the ongoing trend, thereby only causing a thrust and pressure over
such
 individuals. Corporate recruitment generally works on the principle of demand and supply, where the retired employees are substituted by the new recruits,
therefore
, not putting up a certain
age
 bracket would not only mar the entire flow but
also
 would make the profit of an organization diminutive.
Also
, taking into account the health factor, as is often
reconnoitered
Change the spelling
reconnoitred
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, human efficiency decreases dramatically from the
age
 of 60 years,
hence
, a well-defined
age
 bracket that allows
people
 to
work
till
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a certain limit is
very
Rephrase
apply
show examples
essential.
Hence
, we may say in conclusion that
although
 working till the time
one
 wants to could at times seem appealing and required, its ramifications and deleterious effects couldn’t be subsided.
Therefore
, there should be a fixed
age
 limit post which
one
 shouldn’t be allowed to
work
.
Submitted by tamorah2020 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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