Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #music #culture #ages

It is often said that humans who are of dissimilar generations or nationalities benefit from listening to music.It seems to me that the above submission is convenient for most people, and I will explain why in

this

essay.

Firstly

, generally speaking, numerous persons spend their leisure time listening to the melody which can bring contented feelings to the mind of the people.These range from elderly human beings to teenagers.

For example

, countless families often watch together operas which are shown on television.

This

means even

they

Correct word choice

if they

show examples

are the same age or not, they listen together,

moreover

whereas

Correct word choice

when

show examples

they relax they discuss their family subjects.

Furthermore

, a second factor is doing exercises

while

hearing the songs.

This

does not have discrimination.

For instance

, at these activities, there are a lot of souls who are ageing populations, women, men, teenagers,

consequently

Correct word choice

and consequently

show examples

, different citizens, at

this

,point they together participate that case with several fun times.

In addition

, the tune can be described as the universal language, from

this

we can know the other individuals' personalities.For illustration, in the majority of cases, men or women who

liked

Wrong verb form

show examples

to rock have a strong mentality,

similarly

, the community who prefer classical music

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

the habit of keeping calm.

Secondly

, we can

also

know

mortals

Correct word choice

whether mortals

show examples

are happy or sad.

This

is not to say that the overhead fact is always true.

Subsequently

, the main important remedy is

Fix the agreement mistake

communication

show examples

communications

Fix the agreement mistake

communication

show examples

with different nationalities who are not similar in languages.

This

can be seen, especially in

K-pops

Correct your spelling

K-pop

show examples

, in today's modern world,

K-Pop

Correct your spelling

K-pop

show examples

is the most popular genre aside

Change preposition

from

show examples

other types,

this

can combine countless tribes to sing simultaneously. It is true that some negative situations

also

have in

this

issue,

such

as noise pollution which is played at excessive volumes.Despite

this

, there are a large number of positive effects which can reduce stress and depression.

To conclude

, strains have countless benefits including the combinations of separate languages and ages ,

nevertheless

this

has a little negative impact, despite ,

this

is not a major problem.

Submitted by thetpaingphuewaigracie on Thu Feb 10 2022

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Develop your ideas further and provide more specific examples to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic and provides a clear roadmap for your essay.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary and vary your sentence structures for more clarity and fluency.

grammatical range accuracy

Pay closer attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve accuracy.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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17Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

326 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural diversity
harmony
integration
bridging gaps
foster
ignite
embrace
communicate
celebrate
appreciate
inclusivity
universal language
emotional resonance
shared experiences
intercultural dialogue
intergenerational connections
cultural exchange
catalyst

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Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words

As the world becomes technologically advanced, computers are replacing more and more jobs. Describe some job positions that may be lost because of computers, and discuss at least one problem that may result.

People were happier in previous generations compared to now. To what extent do you agree? disagree

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.