IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Nowadays, most people try to balance between work and other part of lives. Unfortunately, not many achieve this balance. What are the problems of this? Suggest some solutions to solve the problem?

#people #balance #work #part #lives
People
 used to limit themselves to only
work
 9-5 but nowadays the boundary between
work
 and
life
 is a grey area, with some taking their
work
 home or vice versa
such
 as bringing your kids and nursing them at
work
.
People
 said that it is hard to balance the two but the real question is: should it be balanced anyway? The
first
 thing that comes to mind when we're talking about
work
-
life
 balance is should we even try to find a balance?
People
 on average are spending >50% of their
life
 at
work
. By integrating
work
 and
life
, we acknowledged that they influence each other and should not be separated as a different thing. You can still contact your families at
work
 and answer
work
 calls at appropriate time after office hours, the key is to compromise.
Secondly
, some
people
 set their standards too high. They want to have the most brilliant career, excelling to be a C-level executives within no time while at the same time
also
 wanting to get everything
life
 has to offer: marrying before turning 30, having a stable family with kids, and so many other
goals
.
However
,
life
 does not
work
 out that way as we need to prioritise. Same as how we are choosing our KPIs at
work
,
life
goals
 should
also
 be considered on the equation. By adopting a concept of
work
-
life
 integration and consciously prioritising which career and
life
goals
 we want to pursue, we will be able to find harmony between
work
 and
life
. It is best not to choose one but to be able to integrate your
goals
 and choose the things that are for now and things that are for the future you.
Submitted by nadita.ayudya on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: