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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Smokers can cause themselves serious health problems. The choice to smoke is made freely and with knowledge of dangers. Smokers should therefore expect to pay more for medical treatment than non-smokers. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#smokers #health #choice #smoke #dangers #treatment #non-smokers
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Smoking is injurious to health.
People
 of all socio-economic backgrounds smoke regardless of the consequences.
However
, I disagree with the statement that smokers should charge more for medical facilities. Despite knowing the outcomes, some
people
 still put their life at risk.
This
 can cause not only harm to themselves but families are
also
 impacted due to side-effects.
For instance
, cancer is one of the detrimental diseases caused by cigarettes. In a
survey
Add a comma
,survey
show examples
 it is found that to lower the stress level more than 60% of women and men smoke in the world. The data is alarming as it is not good for the person's health. Government should increase taxes on cigarettes so that fewer
people
 will buy from the stores. In spite of putting knowledge of danger on packets, the public doesn't stop smoking.
Thus
, it is not
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 effective plan to give
people
 choices and smoke freely. As the poor
people
 are illiterate and they buy their stuff from the store without reading it. It gives a short time of pleasure and
people
 don't realize the effect which will cause in later life.
Moreover
, rich
people
 can pay their bills for the treatments but poor
people
 are not so lucky enough to get the medications and primary treatment for the disease. To conclude, the government should increase the price of all branded and non branded cigarettes packets.
Hence
 public will restrict themselves to buying and knowing the importance of health.
Furthermore
, equal treatment should be given to smokers and non-smokers without paying more.
Submitted by swatisnh09 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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