IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that educated people are more valuable than people who have learned skills through experience. Do you think that educated people are the most valuable for society? What kinds of skills can people learn through experience that can benefit society?

#people #skills #society #kinds #benefit
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Undoubtedly, qualified
scoety
Correct your spelling
society
 are contributing more to the nation than skilled people, who gained knowledge through experience. In my view,
well informed
Add a hyphen
well-informed
show examples
 crowd can bring a lot of positive impacts and results to the surroundings. There are numerous opportunities, which can be converted
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
 worth experience for the uneducated Pupil.
This
 essay will discuss the opinions regarding educated and
trained
Wrong verb form
training
show examples
 through experts. Obviously, the knowledgeable public is the vital source to grow the industries, businesses, software technologies with their talent.
For instance
, intelligent competitors can execute the companies projects to the productive results and feedback. Eventually, it helps to develop the market scenario and
hence
overall
Correct article usage
the overall
show examples
 country's economy. Graduate trained and certified student's get
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 priority to appear on the tests due to criteria.
However
, though there are
experienced
Add an article
an experienced
the experienced
show examples
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
 with sound characteristics,
cannotapply
Correct your spelling
can not apply
 to the potential jobs and opportunities because of no or poor academic record. I believe, intellectual folk can create
good
Add an article
a good
the good
show examples
 lifestyle, can boost financial Planning’s and spreading the motivating energy to the community.
On the other hand
, it has been seen that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 mostly computer technology has been contributing by highly certified or IT persons to the beginners. Basic computers skills would surely explore the job for those learners. Fields
such
 as arts, accountants, music are
also
 the options for the needy one, who can take the training
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 short term basis and implement them into the earnings by various functions. I admit if the authorities promote to enhance the competency of persons based on the professionalism, it would influence to reduce crimes, unemployment ,poverty. Poor background families will get motivated and inspire the children's to accomplish the dreams and goals. In conclusion,
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
 informative generation is precious for the country, as they are the future of the society.
Similarly
, knowledge sharing must-do for the adding Capabilities to the youngsters.
This
 will support
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
society to create equality in human beings.
Submitted by urvashi.rawal26 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: