Family members and friends caring for elderly people find it hard to spend enough time looking after them. What are the causes of this problem? What solutions can you suggest?
Determining the reason for insufficient
time
to take care of the older generation and its solution is an ongoing debate. A close examination will clearly demonstrate the reason for the phenomenon and a method to solve it.
First of all, one reason for the situation is that physical distance between families has increased Use synonyms
due to
intensive urban development. Linking Words
For example
, in Korea, almost all education and job opportunities are concentrated in the capital Linking Words
city
. Use synonyms
Thus
, young students and employees are moving to the Linking Words
city
to find better options. In that case, seniors of the family stay in the suburbs or country Use synonyms
while
their kids leave the area. Linking Words
Therefore
, young people feel that it is hard to spend Linking Words
time
in order to meet older people because they should spend much Use synonyms
time
visiting family Use synonyms
due to
the broad distance between different areas.
Linking Words
However
, there is a feasible solution Linking Words
for
the problem. Change preposition
to
That is
a balanced development plan by the government. Linking Words
For instance
, the nation can stop people from moving to the centralised Linking Words
city
by developing other alternative regions that have various work and study opportunities. If that happens, future students and workers do not have to be relocated from families and homes, because they can get the chance in a closer region than the previously developed Use synonyms
city
. Use synonyms
Consequently
, young generations may Linking Words
get
more Verb problem
have
time
to care for seniors.
Use synonyms
To sum up
, nowadays youths do not have adequate Linking Words
time
to spend with their seniors because the distance between them is broadened. Use synonyms
As a consequence
, the nation can enhance accessibility by forming alternative developed cities.Linking Words
Submitted by koriente on
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task response
The essay adequately addresses the task question, discussing the causes of the problem and proposing relevant solutions. However, provide more in-depth analysis of the reasons and solutions for a higher score.
coherence and cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-developed and provide a clear structure for the essay. Ensure that the body paragraphs are logically organized to enhance coherence further.
coherence and cohesion
Clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion effectively.
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