Some people believe that children that commit crimes should be punished. Others think the parents should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Currently,there is a discussion on
this
Linking Words
issue some people think when
children
Use synonyms
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
crimes things they should be punished and other groups believe that
children
Use synonyms
should not get punished but their
parents
Use synonyms
have to get punished.In my humble opinion,the decision depends on the situation.
It's
Unnecessary verb
It
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mean
Correct subject-verb agreement
means
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that if the
parents
Use synonyms
have taught their
children
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but the kids don't believe that I
thought
Wrong verb form
think
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children
Use synonyms
should get punished.
In contrast
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, If the
parents
Use synonyms
have known about
this
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happen
Wrong verb form
happening
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but don't solve it
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
parents
Use synonyms
have to be punished.I will explain
this
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issue in to issue.
To begin
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, teenagers do something wrong and know
that is
Linking Words
a bad thing but still do it. They need to punish. A good case in
this
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point,
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last
Add a missing verb
is last
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week
Change noun form
week's
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news in Thailand teenager 17 age who killed her grandmother because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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money. She planned by herself and intended to do it.
Hence
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, in
this
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,case the
parents
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should not be punished but rather their child.
On the other hand
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, some
parents
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should be punished because they never look after and teach their
children
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.Sometimes the
children
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never know it is a wrong thing because they grow up it from family.
For example
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, the boy hit the girl because he saw his father who did it with his mother.He has never known before
this
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is the wrong thing. In conclusion, I believe that who
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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to be punished depends on the situation.If the juvenile knows about these
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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wrong things and ,still do it
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they need to get punished.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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if the parent has never looked after their kids before the
parents
Use synonyms
should be punished.
Submitted by suchaya211 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to provide a clear introduction that presents the topic and your position. Likewise, ensure that the conclusion summarises your main points and restates your opinion.
coherence cohesion
The essay shows some coherence, but the structure could be improved by grouping related ideas together and using appropriate linking words and phrases. Additionally, the essay lacks clear and specific examples to support the arguments.
task response
You need to provide a more comprehensive response that addresses each aspect of the question. Develop your ideas with more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points and support your opinion.
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