Some people think watching TV is bad for children, while other think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #tv #children #effects

Everything has two sides. In terms of watching

, some believe that it has a good effect on

kids

. But,

on the other hand

, many believe that

this

will generate

bad

Add an article

a bad

show examples

result

Fix the agreement mistake

results

show examples

for

children

. For people that think

will bring beneficial effects for

children

, they might be thinking that

shows will give

wider

Add an article

a wider

show examples

range of information for

kids

For

example

, the child that used to watch documentary movies will have more information rather than the one who does not.

Furthermore

, through their favourite

shows

kids

will find that process of learning more enjoyable and fun. Nowadays, the

word

Correct your spelling

world

show examples

has become borderless. It is mean that various information from all over the world is accessible for everyone. Netflix,

for

example

, gives particular

shows in

Correct your spelling

different

show examples

differents

Correct your spelling

different

show examples

languages for

kids

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

other countries.

This

will trigger

kids

to learn languages in the most enjoyable way.

In contrast

, for the others who believe that

shows will bring

worse

Correct article usage

a worse

show examples

impact

for

Change preposition

show examples

their

children

, they were worried that

children

have tendencious to copy all things that they have seen on

This

condition will create a big problem in society.

For

example

kids

who used to see action movies are more likely to act violently to their friends or their adults. another

example

, recently there are more youths who smoke since

the

Correct article usage

show examples

early

age

This

Change the determiner

These

show examples

conditions were

also

believed caused by watching inappropriate

shows for their

age

. On top of that, people have much less time to assist their

children

in watching

shows. These conditions are caused by many factors, one of these factors is more pressure in work which will lead people to easier their supervision to their

kids

. in another case the parents will let their heir watch

shows as they want, in order to make them calm. To sum up, in my opinion,

shows will have a beneficial impact on

kids

as long as they are accompanied by their parents.

Thus

, the parent can select appropriate

shows that inlined with their kid's

age

. Another method is involving AI programs on their

, so the

show will get filtered based on the

age

of their

kids

Submitted by bptj151 on Sat Feb 19 2022

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Linking words for giving examples:

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for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

363 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary behavior
unrealistic perceptions
creative pursuits
social development
emotional development
constructive content
screen time
parental guidance
critical thinking
active learning
age-appropriate
media literacy
family bonding
moderation
perceive

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Some people think watching TV is bad for children, while other think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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