Some people today believe that it is acceptable to use physical force to discipline children, but others feel it is completely unacceptable. Discuss this view and give your opinion.

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Many opine that exerting physical forces to monitor children is a suitable method and
this
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should be accepted.
However
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,some people claim that
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is extremely wrong
as well as
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

unacceptable. From my point of view ,I believe that these ways can not be effective.
Firstly
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,in my opinion ,physical forces are the worst ways that the population habitually perform.
For example
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,in most developing countries nowadays ,in some educational centres teachers use
this
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measure to control the anarchies that students create. There is no denying that
this
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could cause emotional problems and some mental disorders
such
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as personality disorders.
Additionally
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,
this
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operation could create a space to escape from schools by pupils. Most of them decide to abandon learning.
Therefore
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,
this
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makes it clear it is a wrong common belief that some people impose on the community.
By contrast
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,others believe it can be useful.
For instance
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,we all know one of the most persuasive ways to stop making noise
pollutions
Fix the agreement mistake
pollution

It seems that pollutions may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
by a child is utilising a physical force. These people regularly claim disciplining offspring is possible just by performing these types of forces.
Moreover
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,human beings usually say ,to conduct it, a scion decides to become quiet and accept rules.
As a result
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,it becomes apparent there is a permanent reason behind each claim via societies. All things considered ,I personally opine that can not be an appropriate measure to make regulations that are essential for offspring. It is predicted that to continue it the number of children who suffer from
side_effects
Correct your spelling
side effects

If you don’t want side_effects to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

will be increased considerably.

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coherence cohesion
Inadequate development of the introduction and conclusion. Ensure to have a clear introduction that presents the topic and a conclusion that summarizes the main points.
task achievement
The response does not fully address the prompt. Enhance the discussion by exploring both perspectives in more depth and providing a balanced view.
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