IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With the development of
technology
Use synonyms
,
people
Use synonyms
 have more ways of communication ,
such
Linking Words
 as telephones, social media... It is true
that is
Linking Words
 the positive development and
also
Linking Words
 which affected
people
Use synonyms
 contact
friends
Use synonyms
, doing work easily. The most popular way has
technology
Use synonyms
 affected is that
people
Use synonyms
 have more chances to make new
friends
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, nowadays many
people
Use synonyms
 like
play
Change the verb form
playing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
games online. So
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
 the games realized many
people
Use synonyms
 from different places.
This
Linking Words
 increases the chances of making some
friends
Use synonyms
have
Correct pronoun usage
who have
show examples
 the same interests and ideas
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 yourself. The other way has
technology
Use synonyms
 affected is that
people
Use synonyms
 could contact
friends
Use synonyms
 and families convenient.
People
Use synonyms
 don’t need to write
Add an article
a letter
show examples
letter
Fix the agreement mistake
letters
show examples
 or call them inconveniently like 20 years ago. We have many apps
could
Correct pronoun usage
that could
show examples
 know their recent life,
such
Linking Words
 as what’s app,
instagram
Change the capitalization
Instagram
show examples
. When we
missing
Wrong verb form
miss
show examples
 them,
also
Linking Words
 can call them
have
Add the particle
to have
show examples
 the video. We don’t
need
Add the particle
toneed
show examples
 worry about distance anymore. Including, if there are very important things that need to be understood
face
Use synonyms
 to
face
Use synonyms
, video call is a good choice to clearly understand the situation at that time.
Although
Linking Words
 the benefits of new
interact
Replace the word
interaction
show examples
 of
technology
Use synonyms
 are so many. It
also
Linking Words
 has some drawbacks that one of
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 uncomfortable
chat
Replace the word
chatting
show examples
 with others with offline communication. Because
people
Use synonyms
 rely on online social networking, they reduce
face
Use synonyms
 to
face
Use synonyms
 communication with others in real life. So they don't know how to communicate with
people
Use synonyms
 offline.
This
Linking Words
 is
also
Linking Words
 a problem in today's society.
People
Use synonyms
 often speak on social media, but in
reality
Add a comma
,reality
show examples
 they dare not talk to others.
However
Linking Words
, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. In the process of development, some problems can not be avoided.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • technology
  • interact
  • relationships
  • connectivity
  • communication
  • online
  • face-to-face
  • friendships
  • romantic relationships
  • family dynamics
  • positive
  • negative
  • development
  • effects
  • formation
  • ease
  • impacts
  • communities
  • connect
  • interaction
What to do next:
Look at other essays: