Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

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Using social

media

Use synonyms

as a means of connecting with others and the world is more and more prevalent. Since most

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apply

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social

media

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websites require users’ personal

information

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for registration and using their services, people are facing a certain degree of risks.

Although

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it would bring drawback to doing so, I believe that using social

media

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have more benefits.

To begin

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with the disadvantage, the risk of giving personal

information

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to social

media

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websites is identity theft. Most of these social

media

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have a membership scheme and require people to provide personal

information

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such

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as name, address, identity numbers and even bank account

information

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, in order to join their membership scheme.

However

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, if the website does not have a sophisticated security system, hackers may easily steal our

information

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for illegal activities,

such

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as borrowing money from a bank on our behalf. We may

then

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face financial loss and legal troubles. Other than the drawback mentioned above, we have some advantages from surfing on social

media

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Firstly

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, we can maintain contact with our friends and family members, even we are living in different parts of the world. The geographical boundaries are eliminated.

Furthermore

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, we can make new friends with the same interests and extend our social circles through the internet. It enhances our social life and emotional well-being.

Lastly

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information

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, entertainment and news can be obtained instantly and easily from social

media

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. We can keep updating on current issues.

Therefore

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, social

media

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makes our life more convenient and allows us to connect with others without boundaries. In conclusion, even though we face the risks of identity theft, our lives are enriched and social connections would be more well-developed. I argue that the benefits of using social

media

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outweigh its drawback.

dfshumTue Feb 22 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

289 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Social media platforms
Connectivity
Self-expression
Creativity
Global communication
Instantaneous communication
Personal growth
Career advancement
Privacy concerns
Identity theft
Cyberbullying
Addiction
Productivity
Misinformation
Crisis

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Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

More and more people are using computers and electric devices to access information; therefore, there is no need for printed books, magazines, and newspapers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from home is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?

In many societies, there is a growing emphasis on individualism, with people prioritizing their personal goals and desires over collective interests. Is this is a positive or negative development?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?