IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

There are social, medical and technical problems associated with the use of mobile phones. What forms do they take? Do you agree that the problems outweigh the benefits of mobile phones?

#phones #forms
In
this
 burgeoning world, mobile is the most used device of technology in the world. Some believe that cell phones create social, technical and medical issues . In
this
 essay, I will discuss different forms of the issues and explain my disagreement with the opinion that cell phones have more disadvantages than advantages.
To begin
 with, one of the major impacts on the community due to phone is the reduced face to face contact.Individuals prefer to talk over cell phones rather than physically going out. Another impact is that students prefer to use mobile to complete their educational assignments. Reduced eye power is another problem caused by cellphones not limited to adults but kids are
also
 getting badly impacted.
Therefore
,
in different
Correct your spelling
indifferent
show examples
 ,ways these devices impact people in a negative way. In contrary to the above,
Although
 devices have bad impacts on human,it is providing a lot of benefits like the internet on the go which is very useful for the youngsters to prepare for their job interviews. Another point is the access to social media apps to contact their friends, colleagues and relatives. There are many health-related applications that help to perform meditation, yoga and regular exercise to keep people healthy. On the technical front, people are doing transactions and other business jobs without wasting time over roads on travelling. In nutshell, Mobile is the required tool for everyone for many reasons.
Although
 there are some drawbacks to the usage of it using cellphones carefully and in a limited way gives us more benefits in our daily life.
Submitted by davinderkaur3190 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: