With the increasing demand for energy such as oil and gas, people start to look for their sources in remote and untouched places. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Write an essay with no less than 250 words.

Nowadays, the requirements of natural
energy
Use synonyms
sources
such
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as oil and gas have risen significantly.
Therefore
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people are trying to extract new places for
such
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energy
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. I completely believe that the drawbacks of
this
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situation surpass the benefits. The most compelling reason for holding
this
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view is the dreadful effects on our planet caused by the extraction of these
resources
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.When
energy
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is extracted from underground sources ,
this
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action produces CO2 emissions which lead to global warming .
Consequently
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, it may lead to the melting of polar ice caps, and changing weather conditions negatively. Flooding and drought are clear evidence of
this
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.
Last
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year, in Spain, some cities experienced flood devastation causing deaths and destroyed buildings. Another potential reason is running out of natural
resources
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In other words
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,
such
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energy
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is not human-made,
thus
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it can not be produced. If people use it excessively , it will be eventually exhausted. The clearest consequence of
this
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is a conflict between countries over
such
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energy
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. Some people claim that the Third World War may begin
due to
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a shortage of natural
resources
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.
Furthermore
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, When oil and gas
resources
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are being reduced, their prices will increase sharply ,and
this
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bring an inflation crisis to the world.
For instance
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, developing countries
in particular
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,
such
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as Iraq and Syria, whose governments depend on selling oil and gas, will suffer greatly. In conclusion, I strongly believe that the downsides outweigh the advantages as they bring many economic crises and harm the environment. In the given situation, it is recommended investing in alternative
energy
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such
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as solar power, nuclear, and hydropower is a proper solution.

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples and data to support your points, especially regarding the impacts of extraction on the environment and economic consequences.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas are logically sequenced to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Vary your sentence structures and word choices to improve the overall fluency and readability of your writing.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and provides a clear position on the topic, emphasizing the belief that disadvantages outweigh advantages.
coherence cohesion
The introduction presents the topic well, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, reinforcing your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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