IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

The most important element in a person’s life is their work. Without a satisfying career, life is meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#element #person’s #life #work #career
Work is one of the most crucial factors in people's lives. Everybody wants to achieve success and satisfaction. Values
such
 as family, friends and love are not the same as being fully fulfilled by ourselves.
Therefore
, there is a question what is more significant in the world? On the one hand, a fabulous career could be somebody's purpose in life. Of course, it is connected with money, luxury and a high level in society. Hard work is extremely worth and gives fulfilment. Especially if people are able to do something that significantly interested them and what is their cup of tea. It is commonly known that very often humans devoted their lives to work.
Furthermore
, without,it they could feel that their existence means nothing.
Moreover
, it is believed that pure cheeriness is connected with self-fulfilment.
On the other hand
, a lot of young population who are focused only on their careers forget about other values. After achieving success often feel lonely and lost in the world. They realized that even if they have an enormous house, plenty of money and the possibility to travel around the world they are completely alone and are not able to enjoy life whatever they do.
Moreover
, they begin to want someone with whom they can share their existence. To sum up, I would like to say that for me the most important part of life is obviously a career.
However
, people should not forget about other values and try to have a great balance between their job and social activity.
Submitted by Liwia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: