Young people who commit crime should be punished the same way as adults who commit crime. Do you agree or disagree?

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When it comes to the
punishment
Use synonyms
of young
lawbreaker
Fix the agreement mistake
lawbreakers
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, some people believe that those who are immature should still be punished the same way as
adults
Use synonyms
who commit illegal acts, while others hold
opposite
Add an article
the opposite
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
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. Personally, I think young
criminal
Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
show examples
should bear lighter
punishment
Use synonyms
than adult
criminals
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
with, most young
criminals
Use synonyms
commit
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
unintentionally that why it is unfair to witness youngsters
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
have identical law enforcement with
adults
Use synonyms
. In fact, many children nowadays are getting
influence
Wrong verb form
influenced
show examples
by social media, while those networking sites are deceptive and misleading.
Hence
Linking Words
, because of these negative
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
on their life, they are more likely to make mistakes and violate the rules.
Besides
Linking Words
, with the rapid development of society, parents’ company is rare and luxury to their families, which triggers educational absence. In another word,
parents
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parents'
parent's
show examples
Add a missing verb
are absent
show examples
absent
Replace the word
absence
show examples
in educating their children
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
lead to
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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of ability
of telling
Replace the preposition
to tell
show examples
the true from the false.
Therefore
Linking Words
, young people will ultimately go astray and commit
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, even though young
criminals
Use synonyms
commit
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
purposefully, equally bearing the penalty with adult
criminals
Use synonyms
will bring destructive
consequence
Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
show examples
in their life,
thus
Linking Words
defeating the whole idea of punishing. It is believed that the whole point of enforcing
those severe
Change the determiner
that severe punishment
those severe punishments
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punishment
Use synonyms
for
criminals
Use synonyms
is to correct their manner in the future. According to the justice, it is inhumane for young children to have
equal
Add an article
an equal
show examples
criminal
penalty
Fix the agreement mistake
penalties
show examples
as
adults
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, because their ages are in prime time to be well-prepared for the future, including the construction of values or learning new abilities.
Hence
Linking Words
, we cannot imagine a kid who
break
Change the verb form
breaks
show examples
the law is punished for longer imprisonment, and it is difficult for
he
Correct pronoun usage
him
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or
she
Correct pronoun usage
her
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to revive and start a normal time on the later life.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
same
Correct article usage
the same
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methods of
punishment
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both for
young
Add an article
the young
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generation and teenagers are inappropriate . In conclusion, due to social causes and
meaning
Correct article usage
the meaning
show examples
of
penalty
Correct article usage
the penalty
show examples
, I believe that youngsters should not bear less
punishment
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than
adults
Use synonyms
. We should give more time for them to take
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
responsibilities
Fix the agreement mistake
responsibility
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
their illegal acts
Submitted by Esther on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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