cientists agree that people are damaging their health by eating too much junk food. Some people think that the answer to this problem is to educate people. Others think education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#cientists #people #health #junk #food #education #work

There are some problems that the number of people who suffered from obesity. Especially, in America, the rate of fat in children is increasing, which is a serious obstacle. To prevent the number, we should rethink that trouble deeply.

First

, some scientists consider that people make their strength by taking too much high calories food like junk food. Surely, rubbish foods include a lot of unhealthy indigents. It influences your fitness and may increase the risk of serious illness.

Moreover

, if you eat it too much, the balance of your well-being will be broken.

On the other hand

, some scientist claims that the lack of knowledge about clutter food causes damage to our strength. Recently the difference in education has been said to lead to real problems for many things. Without the correct knowledge of their own health, they would not know what they should do for improving fitness. So, it is important to know your own energy and how to improve it.

Therefore

, we can not say that education does not work to resolve the health problem. In conclusion, I think that both views are considerable. Fat has some causes,

therefore

we can't decide which is the more correct reason for them. We should lower the frequency of taking some junk foods and learn about their own health. To improve the obesity complication, we have to rethink

this

by seeing different perspectives. To do that, we might be able to decrease the number of obese people.

Submitted by hinako0511 on Mon Feb 28 2022

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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cientists agree that people are damaging their health by eating too much junk food. Some people think that the answer to this problem is to educate people. Others think education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Government pays university tuition for students (which means students do not have to pay). Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays many business meetings and trainings are happening online and not in real offices. Do you think, the advantages of this approach outweigh the disadvantages?

life experience could better gained through family and friends but other say personal experience is better. what are the advantages of both views. Which ones is better

n recent times, economic growth has helped many become richer, both in developed and developing countries. However, those in developed countries are not as happy as they were in the past. Why is this? What can be learned from this? (Write 250 words.)